All About Me

Toodles.

2006-08-07T21:22:00.000+08:00

Change Blog. tehee.

ENTER

Toodles.

fairytale remains

2006-07-25T10:38:00.000+08:00

He hasnt been online for quite osme time now. I cant help it but feel like as thugh i am being pathetic again. I mean, Nura, you know he has been like that since the day we first met. What the heck?

I cant help but feel that he is so far away again. haizz. Whats wrong with Brian. Maybe things can NEVER work out between the two of us. I guess its time for me to stop thinking about him and focus more on other much more, WAY more important stuff like.... being close with HIM. lols.

As selfish as this sounds, Sharifah has advised me to enjoy the best from the two worlds. Meaning, to work things out with Brian and also try to get things going with HIM. lols. i know. tell ME about it. talka bout being selfihs eh. tehee. cant help it larhx. a girl has gotto have her resources stashed somewhere.

Anyways, nothing much has happened in my life. Nothing really significant. tehee. yeahhs. School is the same. Boring, lame and URGH. and now, i am in school, LIT lesson to be exact, blogging while ears tuned in to the noises behind me. A bunch of lower sec students doing drama and stuffs. lols. Nvrm. Let them grow larhx.

Anyways, i think i shall take my leave now. These people are pissing the shit out of me. Lols. pardon my language. but anyways, i shall leave now. Try to do some stuff with the remaining time left before recess [9 minutes more!]. yeahhs yeahhs. ciaoz.

Diff Renditions Of Phantom

2006-07-22T17:40:00.000+08:00

Patrick & Emma Rossum. Patrick is oh so so THE MAN!! a guy who can sing.. uhhh mamamia!

Michael Crawford & Sarah Brightman.

Korean Phantom

Phantom On Ice

The couple is SUPERB. Povilas is hot.

cliff richard is HOT for an old guy.

Thats what ive been doing all day. Video watching and yeahhs. Studied for the firsrt part of the day larhx. =)

Baby, I miss you!

the days are gettin better

2006-07-21T18:53:00.000+08:00

thank you for making my days enjoyable and the end of school, most-anticipated due to your emails. =) your words lift me up. Come baby, lets soar & fly to break free! =)

-shortest update ever. lols. laters. ciaoz.

what a Day!

2006-07-20T17:26:00.000+08:00

darn. today was a whole load of a crap day. urgh. lols. yeahhs yeahhs. Nothing much happened today in school. lols. but 3 things happened AFTER school. before that, we waited for Mus to finish D&T after school so we watched some of the guys play soccer. Especially oogled at those topless few. Or rather only one worth looking at. BUT, not interested.

Anieways. Case# 1.

Went home with Yati, Ain, Mus and Vivi. You know that big machine that sucks the leaves on the street? Well, it was there larhx. So we made way for it larhx but that Vivi go stick his butt out. lols. Was just kidding larhx. Then the machine made a u-turn and the noose poke Ravi's leg. I was beside him, unfortunately and i was screaming larhx! i hate big machines. worst when its sort of chasing you. The driver was unhappy with Vivi larhx. He kept coming onto Vivi - us. Left with no choice, me & Vivi ran all the way to the block! lols. i was screaming all the way larhx!! tehee. embarrassing sia.

Case # 2.

A frightened cat. On a so called ledge. Tried to get it down. It was too scared. Indian woman. Pink umbrella. Poke Poke. Pull pull. i hated pink then. She went off. We stayed on. Ain, shy. Vivi, tired. Ain climbed onto Vivi shoulders. Shes thin, but terribly heavy. They laughed. They hobbled. They failed. Vivi took the a platform to step up on. And...

Case # 3.

A cockroach was underneathe it. Ain standing over it. She didnt see it. at first. i screamed. she looked down. she saw. she freaked. lols. First time i saw her freaked, apart from oral. lols. vivi pulled her hand. she used yatis PE shirt to slap him. lols. Drama sia.

Anywas yes. lols. hilarious indeed. and all throughout, i was screaming except for case # 2. lols. gawd. and had to leave them to catch the bus cos i had to shit. darn. now i feel oh-so-relieved. tehee. anyways, i shall go now. woohoo. i received an email from him. wee!

thank you so much for being understanding.

a dream come true or... self delusion?

2006-07-19T21:33:00.000+08:00

after months of pining & hoping & crying... atlast he has returned. =) i still cant believe it! i mean, wow. its been like MONTHS! suddenly he came back.

But then... what is going to happen now? I mean.. after missing out on each other for so long now, can we get back to what we had in the past? Am i still being silly? Am i actually clinging onto something that has long gone? What can possibly happen next?

I wasnt overly overjoyed but i was content. It makes me feel guilty at some level. But yeahhs, i can no longer be in a state of denial. Haizz... i dunno what to do anymore. Arghh! I cant lie to myself neither can i to him. *frustrated* but anyways, ima just let nature run its course. yeahh. best solution.

Anyways, did i mention that yesterday, the Careless Whisperer guy came to my school. lols. he was an EX-STUDENT! ahhhhhhhhhhh! lols. but yeahhs. the only fun thing yesterday was Royston Tan's videos AND.... the sound of Allan Wu moaning. Yum Yum. Now i know why he is called SUPERman. lols. ciaoz.

Depression?

2006-07-18T19:28:00.000+08:00

Anyways, i havent been feeling quite right the past few days. Its on days like this that i dont like myself. I mean, i cant stop being trapped & tortured by the past. I WANT to move on but sometimes, some things just pull me back. Sometimes i myself land myself in such predicament. Sometimes, i chance upon it unwittingly.

On days like this i start to question myself, my existence, my thoughts, my maturity, my feelings. I will have lots of thoughts going on in my head, so many emotions coursing through my veins. So many reactions to my body. Probably its just PMS. i often get depressed around that time. i think. i cant help it.

The thing that i will always cry about [silly-ly] is the Brian thingy. I know many of my friends are growing sick of listening to it, about it. But its hard really for ME to forget about him. I know its silly & foolish, not forgetting naive of me to cling onto something so stale. But he was the ONLY one that gave me encouragement when i was down.

My mum. She threw the book that i wrote aside when i showed her. I was sad, hurt. But Brian was there to cheer me up, to make me see things differently. I complained and freaked out about having to write a 20,000 words novel. I had written 12,000 words then and had to submit my novel 3 days from then. Brian was there to encourage me. He said he knew I could do it. He knew i was clever. He knew i would finish it all and he would be so proud of me. He shares my happiness, my sadness. He shares a part of me.

You see, he made me feel wanted, loved, cherished. haizz.. im just repeating myself from yesterdays entry. But really, i cant control myself. i would be so happy one moment, and leave me alone, i would be neck-deep buried in my past & eyes tearing.

I miss HIM. i really do. i promise myself i will forget him but its next to impossibility. i really miss you and it hurts me badly to not be able to say it out loud to you. ive never been the kind of person who publicly shows her love but when it comes to you, im bursting with affections to shower you with. but yeah, its all happening in my dreams. Ciaoz.

i confused my feelings with the truth.

2006-07-17T21:20:00.000+08:00

Guys who talk sweet-nothings to their gf should be sued! i hate guys like that. And i hate girls who fall into their trap of sweet words. I hate weaklings! Why must the guys spout words that they dont mean. Why must they make empty promises? Why must he say things to make me hope for more? Whay did he make me promises that he could not fulfill? Why did i belive all his words. I was foolish. I was silly. i was lonely.

I hate this part of me. I am always trapped in the past. I cant seem to let go. i Cant learn to let go. Wen everyone told me to wake up and smell the latte, i ignored them. i lament about him, about us. Now look where its got me. A year has passed and yet im still lost in the past, the shadows of our past.

On times like this, i cant help but be depressed. I seriously wonder when this is going to end. many people called me silly, naive, foolish to be falling for him. But i didnt mind. I just liked that fact that i have someone who is there to love me, care for me & cherish me. Someone i cud call my own.

Why must this happen to me so many times? Seriously guys, dont say the L-word unless you really mean it. I think the same goes for girls. But its easier for us to say this kind of words where as its hard for guys. So when you do say it, make sure you really mean it.

To my broken knight,
I dont know what went wrong. But al i can say is that i will treasure the things we shared together for as long as i live. I really hope that one day we will get to get together. For the past a year and a half, i thought you felt the things i was feeling. But then again, i guess i was just confused about my feelings, about you, about me, about us. How could i hope that things between us could really work out? You will still be my knight in shining armor, there to save me when im in distress. =) Thank you for supporting me when no one was there to do so. Thank you for encouraging me when i despaired. Thank you for everything. Thank you for the memories, baby. You are etched in my heart.

2006-07-17T19:10:00.000+08:00

Its Time To Break Free!

So You Think You Can Dance?

We Are All In This Together. =]

When There was Me & You. take that!

Ok. Video uploaded. tehee. im super duperbly hyper. lols. thx to HSM. wekrekeke. yeahhs. im a fanatic person now. nvrm. anyways, click your 'stop' button on your Internet page to stop the song from playing & to enable you to watch the vids. =)

Anyways, nothing much happened from the time i last updated which is...nvrm. Today i had my O level Malay Listening Comprehension. I grew sleepy towards the end. As always. lols.

Anyways, the proverb "its easier said than done" is oh-so-true. i mean wells.. its not easy to go up to the person you like and tell him you like him. I didnt do anything silly as that. But what im trying to put across that, due to THAT, it hurts me so to actually not be able to do anything remotely couply so as to avoid gossips & speculations. Its getting harder. But i will survive. now enjoy the vids. ciaoz.

Soaring & Flying.

2006-07-16T16:02:00.000+08:00

Zac Efron. Male lead actor in High School Musical.

And boy can he sing! lols. ive watched High School Musical & i am now infatuated with Zac. lols. Firstly cos he can sing! i go soft, really soft on guys who can sing. Secondly, he is oh-so-cute! and I am a sucker for that too. tehee. man oh man. i wud REALLY love it if my guy can sing larhx. lols. Sing for me!

Anyways, nothing much have happened over the few days i didnt blog. However, i do have a lot in my mind. BUT, whenever i get to blog, all those stuff i have in mind just flew out of my mind. lols. I shall end here for now. But i shall add on later if i have anything else to say. =) ciaoz.

Elearning suck.

2006-07-13T21:28:00.000+08:00

Yes. It really doe. Trust me people, studying from home via Internet is SO not cool. So what if youve got free days off? Youre so pissed anyways, having to understand the shit on the net and doing the exercises. Bluek.

Anyways, do pardon my previous entry on 12th July about my birthday. Cos i had the funnest day ever! Tehee. Thanks to all my dearies; Nas [the Function Organiser], Ain, Yati, Sharifah [ the one who wont stop wishing my hapiie bdae], Sharie, Diana, Syahidah, Wina, Sarah, Vick, Winnie & Mus. Yeahhs. That many people. lols. And i got free ice creams! on the house. lols. We went to Coffee Embassy.

So yeahhs. It was very very fun. lols. so yeahhs. and today, i went out with Jas to watch Pirates of the Caribbean. Its nice really but just unsatisfying. Like The Omen. So yeahhs. Anyways, did most of my Elearning stuff. Im so proud of myself. Oh wait, i havent iron my skirt! argh! ciaoz.

Hapiie Bdae Nura.

2006-07-12T13:26:00.000+08:00

wells wells. In a blink of an eye, as a figure of speech, i am a year older now. I am 16! lols. NC-16 movies, here i come! But, theres more to it than just being 16. its when expectations get higher and so you change. But i dont feel like changing just yet. Not yet.

Up to this point, my birthday is just like any other day. Pathetic & useless. No celebration of any sort and no special treatments. =) oh wells, did i mention that as a year of your life pass, you have to learn to just...grow up? Even if you dont want to, you simply just have to.

Im a bitter person right now as my nephew is getting on my nerves & so is my mum. Its not helping that i have Eworks to do. Darn elearning. argh. i think i might just die on my birthday. ciaoz.

how long has it been?

2006-07-11T19:00:00.000+08:00

Havent been updating have i? Dont ask me why. I just dont feel like it. lols. Anyways, i HAVE to blog today. Cos interesting stuff happened.

Mrs Chew told me that there was a bouquet waiting for me at the general office. A card was signed off as Your Admirer. WHOAH. How cool is that? teheee. i am so shy. Mrs Chew was like.. Want me call your mum to collect the bouquet and let her know you have a secret admirer?! lols. hilarious.

Anyways. It contained 3 BLUE roses! my fav flowers on Earth! weee! yepps. so sweet rite? hehe. The card wrote. To Nura, Happy 16th Birthday. From: Your Admirer. i shall upload the pic & show u in the next post. =]

ouhhs. what a wonderful day today was. lols. ciaoz.

someone not me.

2006-07-05T19:52:00.000+08:00

okies. I seem to have forgotten what i had wanted to blog about. lols. let me just crap around first before i continue on. If till then i still cant recall what i wanted to say, i shall just sign off yeahs?

These past few days, i realise that i have been spending too much time with my friends. [i remember what i wanted to blog about!] Before that, i think i am spending less time with my family, especially my little boyfriend.

I seem to scold him more now. awww, i cant help it. He has got itchy hands [sounds like me...]! And when i do scold him, i will feel heavy-hearted after that. His eyes will be saucers big and will look straight into you. Inside i will go.. "Aww.. honey, youre so sweet.. Im so sorry.." but no. i kept a cool face. teehee. but often, i will play with him and tend to him larhx. lols. he IS still my boyfriend you know.

Proceeding on to the topic i wanted to talk about. I collated opinions from others about this question, "If someone call your bf/gf with a term of endearment, would yu feel irritated?" Something like that. Out of the number of people i sent out to, only 1 replied No. The rest, was a yes.

I have to make this clear that i DO NOT like Shun Wai. Admire yes, proud of him, yes. But he is nothing more than a friend that i really care for. I care for every single one of my friends. Try asking them all. Including those foreign ones. The reason why i call him "Shun Shun" was because we were sittin so close so naturally for me atleast, i prefer calling others by something sweet. For Sharifah, its Pah. For others, you would have heard.

Naturally, for Shun wai, was "Shun Shun". Gradually, the name grew on me such that i cant seem to call him Shun WAI. it seemed weird. But yeahhs, i must spare a thought for the person closest to him. So i shall make an effort to call him Shun WAI or atleast a monotone SHUN. yesh.

But after all that, i cant help it if it really slips. Seriously, ive got sweet names for sweet people around me. Its just the person in me. so yeahhs, to avoid more controversy and gossips, i shall change. haiz... ciaoz.

the inner me.

2006-07-04T17:37:00.000+08:00

I guess it is easy for people to discriminate others. But yeahhs. In my case, it is not discrimination. Its about putting yourself before others. Thats bad.

If i do a survey right now on individuals, asking the question, "Have you put others down so that you can appear to be more superior, cleverer, and shine more than the others?", i bet many would admit yes.

Sometimes i wish that everyone would ask themselves this question, "Would putting others down make me feel better?" If it does, well, I have nothing to say. I guess it is easier to just make yourself "save face" by saying something bad about others. Its the fastest & easiest way to prevent yourself from being put on the spot. What weird humans we have on Earth.

But yes. I guess ive been the butt of jokes & ridicules ever since i was small. ive always been chubby [or rather, FAT]. its the genes in me you see. but yeahhs. ive learnt how to put up with immature people who derives delight through taunting others. No one knew but my childhood was hell. Growing up in a society where weight is a conscious thing, it is hard to unleash my true potential. Instead, i chose to let people think that, "oh, cos she is fat, she wont be able to do it.." oh wells.

But all things must come to an end, whether good or bad. Im glad that i have much more mature friends now [except for a few], who dont call me names. They are friends with whom i can truly be myself. Even if something holds me back, they are there to encourage me. Someone like Meng Chin, he encouraged me to continue running; to reach the finishing point. But like i said, not all. I do have friends still that sometimes hurt me with words they say. I dont know if its intentional or not, it hurt still.

But in this world, nothing & no one is perfect. So we just have to go through life as it is. Although the real world is really a dog-eat-dog world, putting others down, dont make you shine any brighter. With good comes evil. With friends like Meng Chin, i can continue to run this race. The race of my life; and never give up.

"Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate.
Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure.
It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us.
Your playing small does not serve the world.
There is nothing enlightened about shrinking
so that other people won't feel insecure around you.
We were all meant to shine,as children do.
It's not just in some of us,it's in everyone.
And as we let our own light shine,
we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same.
As we are liberated from our own fear,
our presence automatically liberates others."

Beautiful lines i took from the movie Coach Carter. Remember people, you might not know it but you might be others inspiration. Being nice wont hurt or kill. =] ciaoz.

DMB - Finals.

2006-07-03T19:16:00.000+08:00

Just look at Shun twirling that mace. Expert! teehee.

You did marvelous Shun. I cant stop saying that. lols. Proud of you!!

When There Was Me & You

2006-07-03T17:30:00.000+08:00

It's funny when you find yourself
Looking from the outside
I'm standing here but all I want
Is to be over there
Why did I let myself believe
Miracles could happen
'Cause now I have to pretend
That I don't really care

[Chorus #1:]
I thought you were my fairytale
A dream when I'm not sleeping
A wish upon a star that's coming true
But everybody else could tell
That I confused my feelings
With the truth
When there was me and you

I swore I knew the melody
That I heard you singing
And when you smiled you made me feel
Like I could sing along.
But then you went and changed the words
Now my heart is empty
I'm only left with used-to-be's
And once upon a song

[Chorus #2:]
Now I know you're not a fairytale
And dreams were meant for sleeping
And wishes on a star just don't come true
Cause now even I can tell
That I confused my feelings
With the truth
Because I liked the view
When there was me and you

I can't believe
That I could be so blind
It's like you were floating while I was falling
And I didn't mind
Because I liked the view
I thought you felt it too
When there was me and you

Song by the High School Musical. I am so into this song now. Darn it hit the bulls eye.

Life Marketing.

2006-07-03T16:57:00.000+08:00

Okay. This is oh so weird. I changed my template to something half-girly, half-idunnowat. Yes. Splendid. To top things off, i have a techno song on! wow! An extreme makeover? Err, i guess yes.

Anyways, today is a holiday. Woke up late. Lols. Cant help it. Ive been losing sleep. Anyways, today as i was ironing my uniform, i came up with a question that YOU should ponder about too.

If you were a living item to be sold, how would you market yourself? How would you sell yourself off in this, lets say, relationship business? Let's try, shall we?

Well, you should pick me 'cause I am simply wonderful. No kidding there. I look for serious relationships all the time. That is probably why i dont have one. Lols. But seriously, if you need someone to lean on to, you can choose me. If you just need someone to listen to, or someone to talk to, you can find me right there by your side. I love to talk, i love to laugh, but if you are not looking for someone to lighten up your days when you are down, you may do a detour now. People might not take me seriously, but trust me, i know when i need to be serious. What more do you need in the person you love?

I will be there to hold you, to comfort you. I will love you til forever comes. Just give me the chance and i will prove to you that i can be the one for you. =] lols. Okay, what a sale. lols.

yes. Thats what i've got to offer, i guess. Nyehhs. Anyways, been at home all day taking care of my dearest nephew. I feel like wringing his neck sometimes! lols. Kidding only larhx. I love him too much to do anything harmful to him. *kisses the top of his head*

I will do anything for my nephew. =] Wait till i satart working and stuff, he will be showered with lots of gifts! teehee. i love kids. I wanna have 4 of my own. *shyys* lols. Yes. i shall go now. Tag me yeahs? Luv y'all! ciaoz.

yummy!

2006-07-02T19:17:00.000+08:00

beautiful body. husky and sexy voice.
a man not to be missed. darn. he is the definition of HOT.

More pics.

2006-07-02T16:41:00.000+08:00

Tehee. a tribute to our DEAREST shun shun. =]

Another pic of him. lols. took it when DMB was playing for our school. Suave!

Okies. This was the parade commander. Darn he was HOT! anyways, ive got a fetish for guys in uniforms. lols!

Okies. this is no ghost picture. Its just that i was walking and trying to take picture with really bright flash. lols. It says DEYI. lols. our posters.

And lastly, the one of many pictures we took using our individual cams! lols. Pretty babes!

Beyond Words.

2006-07-02T16:25:00.000+08:00

1st July 2006 was the date that SYF Finals was carried out at the national stadium. Oh garsh, its also a date in history!

Before i go on to the intersting part of the whole entire day, let me just briefly described what went on. I didnt go with the school to the national stadium. Something happened the night before that caused whatever emotions i went through on that day.

Anyways, walked from Kallang MRT to the stadium with Ain, Diana, Dini [diana lil sis], Yati & Nas. lols. So yeahhs. We came quite early you see. We had tickets for the bench seats. lols. And yeahhs, we sat right at the very front & middle of the whole stadium. wahh!

And yes we held posters of our dearest friends; SHUN WAI, Vick, Siti, Sharie. wee! lols. it was REAL cool. Anyways, time to go on to the intersting part.

Our SHUN SHUN won DRUM MAJOR OF THE YEAR 2006!!! weee!! I was with Sharifah carrying drinks that we bought earlier. I put down the whole box and waited for the person to announce the winner. "Wong Wai Shun!!" it took me a moment to make it who it was. lols. YEAHHS! Sharifah & I were screaming like banshees! lols.

That is our SHUN SHUN in action! weee! how cool does he looks?! Shun, we are all so proud of you! You were simply marvelous, hun! =] You did it! You have really done it!

I cannot seem to post anymore pics on now. I shall post more laters. Because we actually took quite a number of pics. lols. Throughout the whole journey home from Marina Bay to Ang Mo Kio, the few of us kep taking pictures. lols. Photogenic Missus.

What Hurts The Most?

2006-07-01T10:04:00.000+08:00

The singer aint really handsome. But the video is really heart--wrenching. I cant help but cry. Listen to the words. It really hurts, u fcuker. Read this & analyse it. You gave me such heart ache. Fine then. We shall cease it all.

wat a week it has been.

2006-06-29T19:38:00.000+08:00

heyys. lols. whoah. been quite some time since i last blogged eh? anyways, i am not quite sure if you can see the videos now because from my computer, i simply cannot. Maybe there is something wrong with it.

My computer is now rotting. Surprisingly, i am happy over that fact. Lols. it shows that i have been busy with my life. Certainly i have been busy. i have been studying you know. yes. today, i was feeling oh so proud of myself.

I managed to answer for some of the Bio stuff. teehee. oh wells, if i had known being knowledgeable has the ability to make me feel this DARN good, i would have studies my stuff WAY back. lols. anyways, a tad too late for that yeahs?

So this whole week my days have been jam packed with stuffs for Guides & Leadership Handover Ceremony. I am the WONDERFUL emcee. along with Brinda, Jamie & Matthew. For a a sec 1 boy, he is darn cute. a big flirt too. dang it. Why do people with looks like to use them as weapons? As in...

Dont you realise how much true relationship means to these people with looks? I mean, to them, should the relationship fail, they can easily replace it. Haiz. Sad, really. But anyways, tomorrow is a BIG day for me. Not because it is the day of the Leadership Handover, rather it is the day of my MT O Lvl Oral. argh!!

ok. i shall stop here now. i shall go eat. i am oh so so hungry. teehee. ciaoz.

2006-06-25T19:01:00.000+08:00

I cant help it. I love this kind of videos although my heart aches thinking of all these love stories i can never have. Oh man. Why oh why.

Will We Get There?

2006-06-25T18:40:00.000+08:00

Am not REALLY a MJ fan. but before you guys start guffawing about what a pedeofile he is. i dont know how to spell that word. Stop to remind yourself that he is God creation. We have no rights to discriminate or make fun at His creation. MJ certainly was and hopefully still is a legend in the music industry.

Its a sad thing how with tragedies like these, in which he wasnt proved guilty, that people start thinking of him in a lewd manner. Stop and remind yourselves again people, we do not discriminate nor poke fun at our own brothers & sister. Before you make fun, stop and think about that. If you dont, dude/dudette, you may burn in hell.

Never Gonna Leave Your Side - The Vid

2006-06-25T18:13:00.000+08:00

I'm All About You - Aaron

2006-06-25T18:03:00.000+08:00

The nicest song on earth that you can ever listen to.
Enjoy. My Aaron.

Never Gonna Leave Your Side

2006-06-23T13:13:00.000+08:00

I feel like a song without the words
A man without a soul
A bird without its wings
A heart without a home
I feel like a knight without a sword
The sky without the sun
Cuz you are the one

I feel like a ship beneath the waves
A child that lost its way
A door without a key
A face without a name
I feel like a breath without the air
And every day's the same
Since you've gone away

I gotta have a reason to wake up in the morning
You used to be the one that put a smile on my face
There are no words that could describe how I miss you
And I miss you everyday
Yeah

And I'm never gonna leave your side
And I'm never gonna leave your side again
Still holding on girl
I won't let you go
Cuz when I'm lying in your arms
I know I’m home

They tell me that a man can lose his mind
Living in the pain
The call in times gone by
The crying in the rain
You know I’ve wasted half the time
And I’m on my knees again
Till you come to me
Yeah

I gotta have a reason to wake up in the morning
You used to be the one that put a smile on my face
There are no words that could describe how I miss you
And I miss you everyday
Yeah

And I'm never gonna leave your side
And I'm never gonna leave your side again
Still holding on girl
I won't let you go
I lay my head against your heart
I know I’m home
I know I’m home
I know I’m home

And I'm never gonna leave your side
And I'm never gonna leave your side again
Still holding on girl
I won't let you go
Cuz when I’m lying in your arms
I know I’m home

This is about helplessness of not being with the one you love & care for. Where life suddenly seems so meaningless and so ironic. How can one breathe when there is no air? Why be a bird when you have no wings? It makes one despair when your other half is not there with you. As natural as air is to breathe, bird is to wings, door to a key, everyone has their pair. Don't look too hard and don't not look at all. When we were born, God assignes us each a pair. It's up to us now to find that pair. He/She may be at the other side of the world or right in front of you, you will find each other. Till then, your life just unfolds.

hellos.

2006-06-23T11:38:00.000+08:00

Hey. Yesterday, i was at the Singapore Idol Result Show. lols. It was weird at first as i dont supposrt any of the girls. Maybe Mathilda, boy, she can sing! But yeah, it was weird. But subsequently, it was pretty ok. Gurmit is cute! Though he is married. Aww. lol. Daniel was sweet. He tried to put everyone at ease, or rather as cracking lame jokes for us to silly-ly laugh at while waiting for the few agonising minutes before the show will air, live.

It was pretty ok, as i have mentioned earlier. I went there with Nas, Jas, Syahidah, Sharifah, Shahari, Sharif, Fifi, Syazwanah & Ira. Ok, I dont really know the last 4. Ira is someone Sarifah & Shari met over the Singapore Idol roadshows back then. The other three... ermms, lets just say they came to watch not to mingle with us. teehee.

And yes, me, Nas, Jas & Syahidah were the only people who were there at the reception after the show, not feeling at all Fanatic. We were lazing around on the chairs that were provided. And we saw funny yet digusting & irritating stuffs. The antics of all the fanatic people. "We arent Groupies!". yeah right. Bullshit. They were making lots of noise and were irritating the hell out of me. Especially this one red shirt girl. She thinks shes hot & everything. Giving us all that "I'm a bitch" look. Well bitch, fuck you.

Anyways, fanatical[there isnt such a word. i think] people aside, the few of us, without Sharif, Fifi & Syazwanah, we went to Thomson Road there to eat at the Prata House. Yeah. Sharifah & Ira were very pissed & sad about the wildcard selections. Ok, although i am not into Singapore Idol, i seriously think few of those seriously cant sing. Lets go on with the list shall we? Warning: For those fans of these people and dont like what i say, you may click 'X' now instead of reading then reporting me. Grow up if youre going to go to the administrators just to complain about me. I aint writing shits for you to enjoy. Its my blog, my lie, my words, my THOUGHTS. Get it? Now, shall we start?

I cant remember all those who got in [shows how much IMPACT they made eh?], but yeah. Primero. Oh gawd. Save him. Dude, you are too.. emotional? No, its not just that, you are cocky. Dude, people dont like cocky people. Thats a total turn off. Especially when you answer back to the judges when you KNOW they are right. Geraldine, ok... she's ok. Probably she needs the rest to like screw up their performance before she can up. Right? Meryl... she's got quite an ok voice. But when she sang i turn to you... it sounded ok but just so... cheena. get it? There is a tinge of cheena-ness in her words. Its good to have your own stlye of singing instead of copying the original singer... but.. cheena-ness? Eew. Jay, the perfectionist. Ok, he is cute when he is doing that. It shows how much this means to him. But dude, loosen up & lighten up.You need not impress the judges but us. WE are voting. =)

Ok, basically, i wish not to go on. Else all those "We r not Groupies!", people will caome after me. Yeow! ciaoz.

our perspectives

2006-06-21T18:22:00.000+08:00

heyys. Okay, this is the second time i am typing this entry solely because i was crapping just then. Anyways, as you would have observed, i am giving you complete and perfect sentences as I believe my English has deteriorated. That is disallowed! Absolutely!

I am aiming for a wonderful A1. I want to get into Mass Communications. I know how much all those close to me have heard this before. Yes, now I am acertain that I do want to get into that course. It is in fact something that i have been dreaming about.

Academics aside [ i hate to erase that word few times! Godness gracious!], I can testify that with good English, comes good grace. Seriously. Try speaking or putting yourself in that 'perfect English' mode. You will find the sudden change in you a pleasant delight. I am currently sitting up slightly straighter and i am thinking more on the broader side of things. Yes, silly it does sound.

Anyways, you can still have fun with good English. I collected my mp3 on the 19th of June! lols [this is excempted]. I havent been using it really. Probably due to the fact that i havent been going out. Yes.

I shall hurry on to change my template. I saw some great ones just now. I do pray that my computer will not let me down. It has been lagging since just now. Anyways, I shall type off now. Ciaoz. [that is certainly an exception!]

2006-06-20T16:00:00.000+08:00

da things i said abt Neo & Guan Yi isnt true. lols. yeahhs.

slash vids!

2006-06-19T12:30:00.000+08:00

lols. hilarious dudes. teehee. i am so into slash vids rite now. Slash is a [i-dunno] term used for boy/boy relationsip. teehee. thus da vids u wud haf read in my previous posts.

those vids haf been filling my life wif intense laughter wen i first watched dem. lols. till todae, i still cant help laughing at all these. lols. i'm currently searching for more hilarious parodies. so shud i come across one that is SUPERB DUBERBLY hilarious, i shall post. lols.

anieways, todae i am off to FINALLY take my mp3. lols. ive actually specially allocated all the songs to be put into my mp3 into a folder. lols. ghaiRAH! meaning, excited! lols. yeahhs.

todae, was supposedly off to school at 7.15am to go for POA remedial. BUT. lols. but, at 7.15 i was STILL at my com. lols. at first i thought it was 7.30am, so i decided not to go for POA. den i realised. its oni 6.30! dang. lols. so i switche don da com & watched all da slash vids. lols. den wenta sch at around 8.15. lols. POA was frm 8-9. teehee. wen i reached sch, da Guides all havent arrive so i decided to POP by. lols. quite a turn up lehh. lols. and my classmates were like going.. "wahh, so early sia. might as well dun come rite!" lols.

nieways.. now am at home aledi. havin tummy ache. Guides was cool actually. me & Siti cudnt stop laffing. lols. and now i need to go shit. ciaoz.

IT didnt enter. thk gawd. lols.

2006-06-18T20:17:00.000+08:00

I Like the way

2006-06-18T19:51:00.000+08:00

Harry, One more night!

2006-06-16T19:03:00.000+08:00

my future ehh?

2006-06-15T10:33:00.000+08:00

heyys. morning ppl. my aunt is here. lols. i noe.. y am i tellin u? wells. cos shes gt to be da nicest aunt i ever know. lols. wen my mum was away to clean my nephew, she asked me qns larhx abt my future.

so yeahhs. tis wat is goin to happen larhx. i am goin for Mass Comm afta O lvls. straight to Ngee Ann or Temasek Poly.. and to be able to do so, i need to get like 10 - 12 points. argh. my other alternative is to go to the Early Childhood course. yeahhs. small kids. i noe i noe.. u ppl r tinkin.. wat da hell?! but u see.. i haf a thing for small kids. lols. bsides.. i attract dem easily.. somehow. lols. considerin da fact tt ive taught countless kids how to read, raised 3 kids, i tink tt makes me quite a thang for a teenager. lols. yepps. all tt is true.

so yeahhs. laters ima gou out wif MC to study. lols. a-hem. study? lols. i will larhx. denns meet up wif my sister to collect MY PRECIOUS! lols. okok.. i shall stop nawws. teehee. yeahhs. ever thought of ur FUTURE yet? ponder over tis few qns.. where will u be 5 yrs dwn da road? wen we do come for da 10 yr reunion dinner, what will ur frens see as then? ciaoz.

GOOD. VERY GOOD NEWS.

2006-06-14T21:34:00.000+08:00

wee!! ima collect my digi cam & mp3 tomoro! wee!
told my sis to collect todae but she doesnt want to. urgh.
these ppl are out to antagonise me.
anieways, juz blogged to tell u tt. lols.

take a look at my soon-to-be-own-mp3.

wee!! i am so so excited!!

lame dae again

2006-06-14T15:10:00.000+08:00

hellos. anieways, changed my template. lols. it aint exactly new u see.. but nyehhs. i like it still. ive gt this one kind of angst inside me larhx. possibly bcos of one incident.

which im SO nt sharing . lols. sry. anieways.. todae da dae started as boring as possible. and yeahs. i'm waitin for a gd news but it nvr did came. darn it. nvrm its oni 3+ now. lets wait til later. haizz.. i'm so frustrated larhx! eek! damn all those ppl.

anieways.. ive gt nth to blog abt atm. teehee. u juz wasted ur time dude! but nvrm. ima go off nows. read a book. oh yeahhs. did i mention tt ive finished my English hw? lols. but da rest, forget it larhx. =) ciaoz.

The Omen

2006-06-13T20:27:00.000+08:00

"When the Jews return to Zion,

and a comet fills the sky

and the Holy Roman Empire rises,

then you and I must die.

From the eternal sea he rises,

creating armies on either shore

turning man against his brother

till man exists no more."

The movie was more to startling than scary. Maybe it WAS scary. but ot because of the visual effects but psychologically. It makes one fear of the future. Whatever was screened, it was shown with proof. The crumbling of the twin towers, the wars between mankind, the natural disaster, the comet. It's scary really.

The movie ended pretty unsatisfyingly. It had no ending. Basically that was it. But it was good, at least it was real. With no ending, it shows that this has yet to come, and its ending, we do not know. When the scene showed that of the Popes sitting dwn in a conference about this SON OF THE DEVIL, the cinema was pretty quiet. I guess most of us were thinking about the things being said.

Anyways, it was more startling than scary as ive mentioned earlier. lols. yes. i was screamin [not very loud] & covering my eyes frequently. lols. Some of the scenes were predictable though, in which me & me cousin took turn to guess it all. We were spot on. lols.

Anyways, yes. Ive reached home, reeling in from all those stuff that ive learnt & all. Ever wondered why the Westerners are like SO popular and advanced and blah blah blah? Wells, its prolly because they are such geniuses! Look at all the movies the oh-so-popular directors created. Those tragedies.. arent they now coming true? And its also perhaps because thay are so quick-witted. They picked up on all the world issues & related it to something that was written & mentioned thousand years ago in the holy book. But sarcasms aside, the movies they create arouse awareness within us all. They are the ones who make us more aware of our predicament, make us more aware of God & his creations.

Okies, sermons aside, i'm now off to chat or something. lols. Perhaps, i shall go surf for a new template. i'm getting sick of this right now. lols. no offence to the creator. I am just oh-so-fickle. teehee. alrite then. i shall be gone. Remember the poem people. HEED THE OMEN. ciaoz.

BIG DAE

2006-06-12T20:04:00.000+08:00

wells oh wells. it went on pretty ok i guess. nth TT exciting happened. lols. perhaps mayb 2... number ONE ; Shun wai swam in his swimmin trunks! lols. cute rite? number TWO ; sharifah & i swam TOPLESS! lols. SEXAY!

and yeahhs. NEWSFLASH

tis source is frm Alson Mar Kim Yip ; Daryl & Guan Yi has reportedly been seen holdin hands! lols.

and now.. i'm now so boredd. lols. had a really s2 to s2 talk & yeahhs.. he is so in love! lols. my hun is so so in love yeahhs? lols. he is becomn so poetic! lols. how cute yeahhs?

so rite now i am juz rottin & surprisingly am talkin to my old frens! lols. we are catchin up wif each other in a wae... lols. tomoro i am off to watch The Omen wif Sharifah. prolly we will change our mind to cartoons! lols. we are both scaredy cats larhx.. wat da hell. but nyehhs.. it looks intersting larhx.

tis our Brett goin full swing on Poetry ;

ckn: wat sadness lengthens juliets hours?
me: sadness of nt bein wif her loved one?
ckn: & of who does thy love?
me: *CENSORED*
ckn: to tink twice brings abt doubt & to doubt will lead to broken hearts.
me: den i shalt let my heart break to million pieces in the name of LOVE.
ckn: surely if it breaks, it is not in the name of love
*skip forward*
ckn: shud thy feel pain wen in love?
me: it is to make one realise the power of love. how it went through hardships to get through where it is now. to make one cherish love more and treasure it.
ckn: is not failed love turned heartbreak,enough for one to appreciate the meaning of true love in the future?
me: no.nt really. sometimes a heartbreak makes one more wary of Love. mayb even shun Love. its how each other blend as one to attain Love tt makes da journey a sweet experinece.. an experience tt u wont want to end...
ckn: do not confuse love with lust.....for one is pure and one evil....
me: blendin as one means not juz by joinin two bodies into. its also abt bein able to understand each other, cherish each other, care for each other and love each other. without love, there is no lust.. without lust there is no love. neither is pure or evil. its how one Sees it tt determines its nature.

Cuts like a Knife

2006-06-12T18:42:00.000+08:00

"You could stabbed a knife in my back and withdraw it back, but it still leave the scars. nomatter how often you ask the apologize and yer regrets, the scars stay over. Scars by words is always as sore as the agony of the physically scars".

wee!

2006-06-11T17:20:00.000+08:00

hey y'all. i'm here to blog. teehee. lols. anieways... todae is DA BIG DAE! lols. nyehhs. but wat da heck yeahhs? seems to me like one by one ppl are backin out nehh. aiyos..

Juliao dropped da bomb tt she will be dere at 7. haizz.. wat da hell. but nyehhs. den Vani & Parmes backed out. boohoo. so sadd. but nyehhs. we shall strive to make da BBQ livelier. anieways.. todae is gonna be da dae ima strip my SHaney. teehee.

so nyehhs. mums out wif dad & da rest to my aunts hse. so yeahhs.. i hafta be bak hme b4 11. URGH. but yeahhs. its aledi gd tt shes lettin me go. so yess. rite now i am typin tis dressed in UN-GODLY feminine stuff. wif a KPO gurl standin behind me. lols. she juz smacked me. lols. tts SHARIFAH. [da person who was suppose to meet me at 1230 insted of like.. 230!] wee.

anieways.. shall we go OLD CHANG KEE SHARIFAH? da rest are comin later. & i DO crave for tt nuggets. PLS. =]

aiite aiite. time to go nows. haizz... i MISS him lots! eek! ciaoz.

My Teen Celeb

2006-06-11T12:46:00.000+08:00

Score! Your celebrity match is Heath Ledger!

Teen Celebrity Match
Brought to you by Tickle

Sexy Notti Bitchy Me?

2006-06-10T10:52:00.000+08:00

I pick on my skirts to be a lil too sexy.. juz like all my thoughts dey alwaes get a bit notti. wen i'm out wif my girls i awlaes play a bit bitchy. cant change da wae i am, sexi notti bitchy me!

lols. indeed. indeed. but u see... tt isnt who i really am. its juz who i wanna be. ever felt like tt? lols. i guess everyone feels like tt. so tts y i turn to MAPLING! lols. ok.. somewat irrelevant dere but nyehhs. i like it. i cn dress up my character. pamper myself & KICK SOME REAL ASS! lols. besides, no one is dere to question my being. wahahhaa.

anieways... ever felt like bein a totally diff person tt ppl noe u as? its normal i guess. a part of growin up & findin or rather discoverin who u really are. for me... i like to listen to diff lang songs. lols. & in da bathroom, i will play some songs & dance sexily like i will nvr EVER do it in front of my frens. mayb da selected few. wats my fantasy?

i wan to go to a place where no one noes abt my past or noe abt me. period. denn ima create a totally diff me. ima gather all my confidence & make myself sensational. if ure observant enuff. guys dun really go for girls wif looks & shit, dey are also attracted to girls tt carry themselves wif ABSOLUTE confidence. try this girls, GATHER ur confindence b4 u enter a room. den juz JIGGLE ur shoulders a lil. TAKE a deep breath & SMILE. denn, stride in like as tho da world owes u a livin. damn gurl, if u dun turn heads, uve gt to practise hard!

seriously. anieways, continuing, yeah. a place where no one else noes me. and den ima strike up all my confidence & blast others wif my personality, wif who i am & what i am. ima play wif all da cards tt i haf in myself. oh yeahhs. atta gurl!

so yeahhs. enuff fantasizing. tomoro is da BIG dae! lols. wat dae? BBQ @ HAUDY DAE! lols. yippee!! [jumps up & dwn] woohooo! okies. i dunno why im like SO excited. prolly cos ive been cooped up in tis hse for sooo long. plus, im totally boredd. dun even tink abt those homeworks dude/dudette. tt aint me. i am da last min girl. so yeahhs. finally! salvation! civilisation! i'm so goin out tomoro. weee!

anieways. NEWS FLASH!

a guy juz asked me out! lols a Chinese guy juz asked me out! i dun even noe his name. trust me. lol. he came online, saw my pic, greeted me & boom, "wanna go out wif me?" lols. for me, i am pleasantly surprised and delightfully pleased. however, i turned him dwn. firstly, i need to FIND tt CONFINDENCE! lols. next, i am nt yet ready. for pete's sake, i oni noe tt his age! & his looks! average lookin. thk pete. and yes.. lastly & most importantly, im still tinkin of ~~HIM~~. i dun want to cheat my feelings nor tt guys. so yeahhs. told him to take it nice & slow. but nyehhs. we aint talkin. erms.. HELLO?!

lols. anieways... hve gt no plans for todae. argh! so irritatin. mayb i shud go for da friggin roadshow! lols. im TT boredd larhx. wat da hell. eeek! no wae. it ink i shud juz go surf for more PORNS, VIDS, GAMES & blah. lols. porns? ahh. .. abt gays perhaps. and share it wif. U NOE WHO! lols. teehee. kiddin. anieways. i'm off to surf da net. if deres really nth, den im to be whisked awae by my ROMANCE BOOK LOVERS. lols as in. da hero in da book. wee! rescue me! help me! fuck me!! lols. despo. ciaoz.

don't speak.

2006-06-08T19:46:00.000+08:00

i now noe one impt reason why i sometimes yearn for dat SOMEONE to be wif me, to be mine. its cos of da GRIEF tt i get from my family members. i want my man to be there to comfort me & console me wenever i haf a fight wif my family. i wan him to be able to tell me how silly i was to be in tis fight in da first place. i wan him to be the one who clear my irrational thoughts & calm me dwn, & set me thinkin.

haizz.. anieways. sometimes, dun u tink parents take their children for granted? i mean.. seriously. they ask u to do every small things tt dey cud do demselves. i mean ok.. as selfihs as it sounds.. considering tt uve been at da com for hours & Mum tells u to close da door tho she's nearer to it. and u start grumbling abt WHY cant SHE do it.. and she will go.. like tt oso cannot help? ure already hoggin da com 24/7 and now u r tryin to reason wif me?! blah blah blah..

get da picture? yes. TTS my grief. todae, i felt like a grown WOMAN. i felt lieka MOTHER! for pete's sake! i fed my nephew, i played wif my nephew, i controlled his tantrum, i even put him to bed! wen i meant by fed is tt, i eat, he eats. i hafta chase him around to eat. AND, i havent even bathe at tt point of time. i had to make sure he was soundly asleep b4 i cud go bathe. haizz..

i merely slacked todae. REAL slack. i cant wait for tis coming Sundae. lols. bbq at haudy's. AGAIN. lols. and yeahhs... one more thing to rant abt..

da drama serials on tv now. Gawd, they are HORRENDOUS! its no wonder tt WE are spending more time on com. and reading my wondrous blog. lols. yeahhs. da characters are overbearing. they are TOO over their character. its sickening. dey cry too much, hate too much. everything is too da EXTREME. how irritating. where did all those wonderful drama serials in da past went? even Hong Kong dramas are more entertainin. im seriusly considering Korean & Japanese dramas now. darn it. ciaoz.

This I Swear - Nick Lachey

2006-06-06T18:01:00.000+08:00

You're there by my side
In every way
I know that you will not forsake me
I give you my life
I would not think twice
Your love is all I need, believe me

I may not say it
Quite as much as I should
But when I say, I love you
Darling, that means for good
So open up your heart and let me in
And I will love you, until forever
Until death do us part
We'll be together
So, take my hand
And hold on tight
And we'll get there
This I swear

I’m wondering how
I ever get by
Without you in my life to guide me
Wherever I go, one thing that’s true
Is everything I do
I do it for you

I may not say it
Half as much as I should
But when I say, I love you
Darling, that means for good
So open up you heart and let me in

And I will love you, until forever
Until death do us part
We'll be together
So, take my hand
And hold on tight
And we'll get there
This I swear

So whenever you get weary
Just reach out for me
I'll never let you down, my love

And I will love you, until forever
(Until death do us part)
Until death do us part
We'll be together
So take my hand
(So take my hand)
And hold on tight
And we'll get there
Oh, we'll get there
And this I swear

And I will love you, until forever
(Until death do us part)
Until death do us part
We'll be together
So take my hand
(So take my hand)
And hold on tight
And we'll get there
Oh, we'll get there
And this I swear

mushy eh? lols. tis goes out to the guy tt i like. ermms. yeahs. shy lahhs.

i'm so lonely.

2006-06-06T17:27:00.000+08:00

haizz.. i dunnoe why but my thoughts & mind suddenly swerved to Brian & Brett. lols. urgh. i hate this type of me now. I mean, i like to bring up the past. which is unhealthy. trust me. I'm not really proud of my past u see. so yeahhs.

anieways, todae i watched 2 movies. lols. cos i was darn boredd nyehhs? wat da hell. den i sat in my room, stoning. lols. nahh. i was singing larhx. lols. got nth better to do mahhs. den a thought strucked me. " why didnt i join singing competitions?" den i thought again. ouhhs. its cos i'm shy. lols. seriously. i might be a student leader & all.. so u wud tink tt given da exposure and all.. i'm pretty a confident person. but i'm not. not totally. so yeahhs. my voice, da privacy of my room or bathroom. lols.

and yesh. nvr once did thoughts of HIM leave my mind. i dunno. i like him lots but wen.. wells.. wen i see potential others who might snatch is attention, i feel like i'm bereft of all emotions. i stone. i turn indifferent. but no one noes. except me. lols. so yeahhs. i like da word 'bereft'. for some un-godly reason i dunnoe why. anieways...

i dun wish to revert back to da old me. i dun wan to chat up lots of guys whom i noe i wud nvr meet in my life. so yeahhs. its a waste of time.. but still... dey are da oni ppl i cn turn to in times of solitude. so yeahhs.

i had a dream abt my old old primary school. i dunno why. i juz did. it was.. saddenning in a way... intruiging the other. so yeahhs. i cant rmb clearly wat da heck was goin on but nyehhs. who cares. i dun. really. i dun. ermms.. yeahhs.

i'm currently darn boredd & my heart is feeling restless. so yeahhs. wat do i do naws? anieways.. i cant stop tinkin abt HIM. his on every single thoughts of mine. tt sucks. urgh! its like.. violation of my thoughts! argh. but anieways. i shall BE mature & think SMART. i shall not & will NOT fall for his stupidity or watsoever[i'm spastic. i fall for stupidity.]. i shall NOT & will NOT fall further for him. he's not worth it. we dun haf anything in common do we? Opp. attract? ermms.. mayb not in my case. lols. so yeahhs. ciaoz.

oh i miss him so!

2006-06-05T19:27:00.000+08:00

wee! finally i'm back wif Chloe! lols. afta 5 long years, we're finally chattin wif each other! yeahhs!

it was awkward at first for me. cos i regard her as my close fren, someone wif whom i can pour my feelings out. but afta 5 years of separation, does she think of me as that still? haizz.. but nyehhs. she turned out to be da same person i knew, even better actually. =)

so yeahhs. now tt ive told her abt HIM and all.. and we had a talk & devised plans on askin him out or sth, i realise tt its really nice to haf someone from my past back with me. Apart from her, i reunited wif Fanny too! lols. tis is so so cool. i'm being reacquited wif my old frens. how cool eh?!

so yeahhs. todae wenta school to get m charger. left it at sch. denn ermmss.. tried to be a nurse for an hour. lols. i suck. cudnt seem to get da correct things done. was supposed to dress Jas' wounds. called Neo & stuff. lols. it was basically COMICAL. lols.

anieways.. juz dropped by to say that i MISS HIM NOW!!!! argh! and it seems to me tt da stuff tt i wrote abt in my bok of fantasy is sort of comin true. lols. i wont tell u which but yeahhs. example.. i wrote him saying ____ to me & he actually said ____ in real life to me! lols. cant u believe it? and to top it off, i wrote da scene as tis place & true enuff.. its happening again. arghh!! wat does tis mean?! ahh.. is tis a good omen? ahhh... i wonder... lols.

so yeahs. i juz miss him a LIL. and am liking him A LOT. and possibly learnin to love him? nahhs. LOVE, not yet. i juz realise sth. lols. i AM darn scared of relationship. cos wells.... i dunno... no one noes da real me. no one. seriously. so yeahhs. plus.. well... i juz dunno how to react in a relationship. how to act. how to conduct myself. shud i be in love, it wud be vry intense. wud my intensity scare my guy? oh wells. wat da heck. i tried to tink myself wif someone of da same sex as me... its a lil weird but.. i cant stop myself from tinkin.. "why cant i haf HIM?" yeahhs. haizz.. my mind is focus-ed oni on HIM.

so yeahhs. wat da heck. i shall go now. urgh.life totally sucks larhx. wat da heck. haiz.. Lit students, remedial on 20th June. Save up money tho cos Mrs Chong wanna bring us out to watch a performance. ATLAST! lols. ciaoz.

my pride & joy.

2006-06-04T15:59:00.000+08:00

camp was a success! teehee. i mean... wells.. tho our objective WAS sidetracked a lil but nyehhs. all in all, it went darn well. we sticked to da time schedule and all. so yeahhs.

da nitewalk was superb ppl! lols. thx to Agnes, Daryl & Cheryl Hee. =) i had duty wif Josh. at da Kosi -corner. at first i dinna wanna go but nyehhs. its my last yr yeahhs? so wad da heck. Ganga cried like nobody's business. and a few others got scared. including Ms Foo & Ms Haryati. lols.

da ending was FANTASTIC! lols. da excos gt everyone to gather at da canteen. den we put on an act. lols. i lied dwn in front of da General Meeting room and pretended to haf fits cum possessed or sth. lols. and i shook all over & cried out. some of dem belived it was true others had da gut feeling tt it wasnt cos it was ME. i guess i am such a friggin joker. den oso, some said dey saw Neo smirking. aiyo. spoiler!

towards da early morning, roped Larry & Vick to bathe wif me in da girls toilet. lols. it was COOL! lols. i was in da middle cubicle larhx. den Neo joined us. he came in last but was da vry first to go. haizz. and yes. he didnt change underwear nor shorts. ish. guys. for me.. i FORGOT to bring an extra bra. lols. oops.

den da whole nite we didnt really sleep larhx. disturbed those ppl. put face paint & all. lols. one of da guy sleep so so cute!! lols. imagine.. it was 4.30am but we adjusted da clock to 6.15am & woke dem all up. lols. so hilarious & comical. shud haf recorded da look on their faces. teehee.

so yeahhs. tts basically all larhx. den ystd went to sis' hse cos got bf's bdae celebration. lols. got too tired at da vry end. cudnt keep my eyes open anymore so i went to sleep first. woke up later at 5.28am to find myself alone in da room. took apillow den went to da livin room where everyone was slumped somewhere so yeahhs.. joined dem. lols. yepps.

so now i'm back afta watching da extended version of Eiffel...i'm in love. haizz.. i wan a boyfren like Adit. he is someone so strong.. so arrogant & egoist but wen it comes to da person he loves.. he mellows dwn like nbd's business. haizzz... and wen he kisses. oh gawd.. his jaw is so so angular! haizzz...

anieways, all i cn sae nw is tt i dun miss him i juz like him. lols. how weird. so yeahhs. wadeva. i'm off nawws. ciaoz.

gd morning!

2006-05-31T11:20:00.000+08:00

its da hols already but i'm still awake fairly early. lols. i am goin out for sch laters. haizz.. so sian. but nyehhs. hafta tidy up all those things larhx. anieways.. i'm like so broke larhx... teehee. so i need da cash yatee! and Jas too!! lols.

right now i'm perched up high on my chair typing for my blog & listening to a sad sad song while tinkin of my significant HIM. the him i can nvr haf. lols. and yesh.. chattin to my frens too. haizz.

so yess... i'm like so totally sian rite now. mum went out to meet sis for breakfast. ermms, yeahs. lols. and i reckon dey wont be back so early. i ponn Physics todaee. i dunno why. got influenced by Jas i guess. lols. talk abt peer pressure. teehee.

anieways, changed my template larhx. tis time its darn simple but DARN nice to my eyes. lols. so pleasing. i shall strive to blog often. lols. actually, i alwaes say tt afta i chaged my template. lols. so, wat da hoot.

theres tis one pic i forgot to post. pic of tis chocolate castle i took at the chocolate boutique.

beautiful isnt it?

so yeahhs. rite now, i shall go sing more songs.. [tts wat ive been doin since tis mornnin] lols. and yeahhs. den get ready to go to sch. haizz.. life sucks.. if oni i haf a HIM... den we cn go out early in da morning & go for breakfast.. awwws.. anieways... ciaoz.

wat a wonderful dae!

2006-05-30T18:53:00.000+08:00

29 May 2006

went to my vry first K Box outing wif Nas, Yatee & Sharie. lols. it was quite an experience larhx. i mean, atlast, the songs tt ive been listening to, i cn now sing dem. lols. it was vry funny larhx.

we sae Marlene dey all in da box too larhx. lols. pretty hilarious actually wif sharie dancing to Naughty Girl. i tink our k box was da most happening cos we laughed & screamed so loud tt da waiter came in to check if everything was ok. lols. how embarrassing. teehee.

so yeahhs. den sista called so had no choice but to go home larhx. i so guai watt. plus she sounded unhappy larhx. so yeahhs. but da rest stayed on until 7+ i was told. sheesh. unfair!! lols.

30 May 2006

todae went sch.. so sian larhx. but den, ponn physics. lols. den hor, tried to pass da friggin lemon using da neck arhx... aiyo.. so hardd!! i was like resisting Rachel Hoe who was coming towards me to take da lemon larhx. lols. i dun tink anyone cn come near me without me resistin now. oh nos! wats gonna happen if my future guy wanna kiss me? awww? lols. bull. sosha. sosha! traumatised.

anieways, i shall go now. need to do up da programme. lols. yepps. ciaoz.

Genting & KL trip. wee!

2006-05-30T18:08:00.000+08:00

okies. i'm back! lols. time to update larhx. its been like how long alreadi? haizz.. anieways... tis time ive gt pictures to accompany my post. wee!

tis is da beautiful scenery at
Genting. =) and yeahhs. its
all clouds. beautiful yeahhs?

tis da indoor roller coaster
ride tt i rode.. TWICE!
lols. da whole building cn
hear oni my voice screaming.
weee!

tts yours truly in da cable car.
it was scary. cos below us was
juz da jungle. lols. imagine
if we'd fallen inside... uhh..

my hotel room. sharing wif my aunt.
supposed to be my cousin sleep wif
me but HE cant possible sleep
wif ME rite? so yeahhs.

gettin cosy in my room.
weeehee!
"boi u wanna come to my hotel..
all u gotta do is holler at me"
teehee. so pretty ehh?

& tis is how my bed looks like
the following dae. lols.
beautiful ehhs?

the lobby of Legend Hotel.
its nice really. lols.
5 stars. wow! lols.
in KL & has got easy accessed
transportaions around. wow.

me at da lobby. lols
its so.. yellowy
and orangey. lols. nice.

anieways. im not gonna post every pic inside here. lols. basically. tts da essence of it all i guess. i enjoyed it a lot except for a few glitches here & there but overall its ok. and yeahhs. there was tis really cute guy larhx.. on da same bus as me. lols. we took da same trip most of da same time larhx. so nyehhs. teehee. wadeva larhx.

anieways. i dun miss him lerhx. lols. as in not tt much liao arhx. now too busy wif camp & results larhx. Luah called my hse. now my mum wont stop harping abt me failin POA. haizz.. another person Luah has possessed. haizz.

i shall go now larhx. damn sian. hafta do up da programme again. haizz. sian agains. lols. kk. cya. ciaoz

i'm off nawws.

2006-05-26T16:35:00.000+08:00

yesh. Mly O lvls tis coming Mondae & tonite i'm off to Msia. lols. goin Cameron Highland, Genting & KL. lols. so cool!! anieways.. yepps.

todae i found out tt ive got Mly intensive da WHOLE DAE. argh! so yeahhs. ive gt nth to blog abt actually. at hme alone. mum ovr at sis. later comin hme denn all da huhuhaha will start. lols. ima take lotsa pics wif my fone. ima spend some time off tinkin abt.. stuffs. haizz.

i miss him. but tts it. lols. juz miss him larhx. so yeahhs. anieways, am off nawws. lols. shud i bring ovr my swim suit? hmmms. lols. nahhs. my mums bdae wat so at nite we all goin out arhx. so yepps.

i shall go off nawws. cya all. wish me a safe journey there & back. if i die, juz now tt u've been loved by me. =) and tt.. well... to da guy tt i like, i'll be watchin ovvr u from above [or below]. =) God bless you, my dearests. ='( ciaoz.

[[nummbs]]

2006-05-25T16:39:00.000+08:00

okies, they changed the blog thingy. its all blue nawws. or is it juz me? anieways, i need to get some stuff off my chest.

To Daryl Neo,

You suck big time my boi. you really do. I hate you to da core rite naww. So what if the dinner is cancelled. Aint my fault is it? I am disappointed myself. For Pete's sake, we started tis idea in like wat? January?! darn ur arse if u tink i'm unfeeling abt tis. Secondly, yeah i like to say, "It's not me!". But you, mental pompous arse shud noe wen i mean it. I really didnt take out tt bloody file. Oh well, its over aint it? Well, screw you. I hate your guts & darn my soul for havin to work wif u tis coming camp. I hate you. You suck.

phew. had to get tt out of my system. anieways, i need to go now, i need to do up da whole list & stuff for my councillors. teehee. tt felt gd. MY councillors. errr, nvrm. anieways, i got 39/50 for my Lit! weee! can u believe it?!

well i cant but i will eventually. teehee. well, screw tht SOMEONE who keeps suan-ing me for nt studying. well, look dude, who's da last one laffin naww?

ima go bathe naww. got caught in da rain. it was fierce i'm tellin u. all tt lightning & stuff. got permanently frightened by it wen i was asleep once & there was tis one grandfather of all lightning which striked and followed by tis grandmama of all thunder. whoah. got frightened since denns. lols. shyys.

anieways, i betta get goin naww. plus i'm hungry. lols. cant help it larhx. gotta catch my Taylor on tv laters. lols. he's da AMERICAN IDOL. SOUL PATROL SOUL PATROL!!!!! teehees. ciaoz.

p.s: Neo, you suck shit.

ouh wat feelings i haf...

2006-05-23T19:36:00.000+08:00

i dunno why but i suddenly had tis intense feeling for him wen i came home todae. it was so intense tt my heart, i could really feel it constrict. it was, whoah. and yeahhs, it really suck cos i gt all sadd & dwn. it was horrible really. i started tinkin of wats gonna happen if he's no longer around & tt sorta stuff. darn. it really sucked. urgh.

anieways, todae had intensive Malay. lols. it was quite ok larhx. wasnt bad. so yeahhs. oh yes, guess wat? i slept on my own ytd nite! lols. it was cool larhx.. but still need time to get used to it larhx.

aniways, rite now i am sho sleepy. lols. i tink u noe why. but nyehhs. i'm off now. teehee. nite. ciaoz.

life is SUPERB DUBERB-LY BUNDERFUL!

2006-05-22T17:41:00.000+08:00

wee! todae got back da results for some papers. teehee. i am SO hapiie. my results are better den ive expected! lols. i DUN believe tis! lols. can u believe it? I PASSED MY E MATHS!!! lols.

sho hapiie larhx. denn my SS oso did better den i expected. lols. wakrakakka. i am SUPERB DUBERBLY hyper naww! lols. i cant stop grinnig and all. lols. so yeahhs.. but anieways..

todae was a boring dae in da beginning larhx. cos had some Career Carnival. please larhx, da name doesnt even matches da activities we had. or rather.. lack of dem. we were merely walking around attending short 'seminars' wif facilitators from various Polytechnics. lols. its boring. trust me.

somehow... i dun like him tt much naww. oh wait, lols, ive been sayin tis for some time lerhx. lols. but nyehhs. i really dunno wat to sae larhx. sometimes i like him sometimes i dun. denn one moment i'll be tinkin madly of him da next i cant be bothered. urgh.

Break it down now I'll tell you what I feel

From the moment that I met you it's been so damn real

My heart seems to skip another beat every time we speak

Can't believe I feel so weak

Tell me that you really need me

And you want me

And you miss me

And you love me

I'm your lady

I'll be around waiting for you

Put it down be the woman for you

I'm falling so deep for you

Crazy over you I'm calling

Callin' out to you

What am I gonna do?

tts da song i haf for my dearest HIM. lols. tho he doesnt noe who he is. diao.

anieways, i am FURIOUS at Neo. he cn nvr keep his promises. he is da one who started da dinner idea and all. and tt sick foo fang jun supported Neo. argh! guys are such jerks. such rude pompous arseholes. urgh! i hate dat NEO. everything to him is so funny so relax. urgh. i am SO stressed. argh!! ARGH!!

i'm cool. I'm calm. I'm Nura. =D nvrm. i shall go now. ciaoz. urgh. sad songs make me sadd. ciaoz.

Wat a day.

2006-05-19T17:05:00.000+08:00

Physics paper finally over naww.haizz. but somehow i dun feel tt elated yeahhs? so yeahhs. wat da heck. todae turned out to be da most suckiest dae everr.

finished the paper early yeahhs? and so went to Amk Central wif Sharifah.. intended to go to Popular to buy some stuff & head back home but nyehhs, the shop was still closed. lols. so we wenta Banquet instead. oh, did i mention tt i woke up todae wif a sore throat? its still hurting now. =(

and yeahhs. was in the bus wen i called my mum to ask her to come dwn to da paint shop. i mean, i wanted to like strengthen or bond or wateva shit. i mean, dude, im ur daughter, show me some enthusiasm will ya? i'm abt to haf my OWN ROOM afta 15 years!! but NO. she said why are u in a rush?! wait later until ur sista come home... and dude, ystd i did juz tt, waited for my sis but wen we went to da shop, it was friggin CLOSED.

got pissed by tt. selfish & silly as it sounds, but nyehhs. why cant she juz pop by? entertain me? BE a mother. darn it. so yeahhs. locked myself in da rm straight. didnt even bathe! darn i stank! lols. but yeahhs. set out to do some lil stuff for my room. turned out pretty well yeahhs? am gonna go print out more pics next week! lols. so yeahhs.

came out hours later to find my parents going out. dude, i'm part of da family! HELL-LO! urgh. nvrm. cleaned da rm and all. denn bathed. [atlast! lols. i smell of Green Apple!] wee! anieways, tried on my black gown. SHOOTS. ive grown obnoxiously fatTER. argh! but anieways, i got da curves still. wakrakakka. to quote DEAREST Juliao, "Your nose bleed looking at my curves ar?" or some sort like tt. lols.

and denn sis called to tell me to wait for her at da paint shop. i was juz gettin into tis one reality show. urghh. so went dwn. had to wait for like 10 minutes before i saw them all. oh, my dad wenta get his teeth pulled. [and he's now an angry man cos his gums are hurting as hell!]. ouchie. poor Daddy but nyehhs. gettin his dentures soon yeahhs? i'll be waiting to take ur first pearly white smile Daddy! =*D

and yeahhs. bought my paint & other essentials. lols. anieone wanna help poor me?! lols. denn bought my bed at da same time. haizz.. SERIOUSLY, why cant those designers design NICER single beds?! urgh. i feel like some bachelor living off his landlord's bed. Yuck. disgusting. but nyehhs. its MY bed. weehee!!

so yeahhs. and now i'm bloggin. throat is still a lil bit sore.. [anyone wanna buy me Strepsils? i like honey & lemon... yum yum yum]. and yeahhs.. i dunno wat ima do laters. mayb clean up my room furter. lols. like wrap them all wif newspapers? hmm yehhs. i'll do juz tt afta... MUCH procrastinating. wee. ciaoz.

"Chemistry was crazy from the get go

Neither one of us knew why

We didn't build nothin' over night

Cause a love like this takes some time

People swore it off as a phase said "We can't see that"

p.s: if only i can really say that this is true. baby, i miss you so much. i didnt noe lovin u is tis miserable but if given the chance to ~~get you out of my mind~~, i will not even consider it. i didnt set out to fall in love wif you but well, i fell badly & hurting like shit naww. juz thought u wanna noe, im still lickin my wounds rite naww. every nite i ~~wish~~ pray tt u will be dere for me. tt i can wake up everyday noeing tt someone loves me lots. teehee. Love is totally unbelievable. Love is you.

it's so unbelieveble...

2006-05-18T16:50:00.000+08:00

heyyas. todae had the A maths & Science(Bio) papers. haizz. i tink i did ok. exceeded my ecpectations. lols. meaning, erm... i actually noe how to answer some of the qns! lols. and here i thought i won't be able to answer even 10. lols.

denn...went home straight wif Sharifah.. lols. sorta walked wif julia they all. lols. Neo is forever being irritating. as always. but nyehhs. sat dwn and Sharifah asked me a weird qn. "If given the chance, who would you sleep with in this world?". lols. tt set me thinking. i was tinkin of HIM but nyehhs. tink id take those dancer guys. REAL dancers, not m&d. lols. yepps.

anieways... todae while waiting for da time to be up, i looked around da hall and realise sth... i realised tt da teachers sort of sacrifice themselves for us. as in.. well, we should appreciate them for their efforts actually. i mean, seriously. someof those teachers haf got potential in their subjects, like why not be an accountant? so yeahhs. but they took teaching as a profession cos they like it? mayb. lols. i shall give them the benefit of a doubt.

anieways.. listen to the song clearly. "I can't help but break down, and cry.."
oh wells. cant help it can i? not tt i broke dwn & cried but nyehhs. the feeling of being in love is certainly wonderful. well not really love, infatuation prolly. but tink abt it. Infatuations can make u feel like every day is a beautiful & wonderful day, what about love thenn? boi oh boi. i guess tt'll be like every waking moment of urs is a hapiie & wonderful moment.

i've nvr been in love really. mayb strong infatuation. but nyehhs. wat if.. wat if.. tis time i'm in love? lols. i shall not delve too much into tis kinda things yeahhs? i shall juz look forward & all. tomro is da last paper [at last!!]. so i shall TRY to revise my stuff todae/tonite and dream more abt ~~HIM~~.

p.s: Juliao, i'm not telling. lols. =)

i cant be without you baby

2006-05-17T20:49:00.000+08:00

i am a failure. i didnt study Bio. yes! i really didnt! how cool is tt?! i noe tt sucks big time.. i mean.. urghh... i seriously dunno wats gonna happen to me..

anieways, today's papers suck. and my com is lagging. so i shall blog tomoro.

i'm in love with you...

2006-05-16T15:21:00.000+08:00

anieways, todae had my Maths paper 1. teehee. i dunno if i'm boasting or wat but its quite easy i guess. but i tink ima lose marks due to carelessness. haizz.. noe hw to do lerhx but careless. haizz.. didnt haf time to check my answers actually. used up da last 3 minutes to do tis one sum. haizz.. so sadded.

anieways.... todae. haizz.. i dunno wats come over me. i.. nvrm. i am sho sho sadd rite now. i dunno why larhx... but i cant stop tinking of HIM. urgh! tis is frustratin. ive told myself time & again ive forgotten abt him but still. haizz...

anieways, todae ive gt tuition. either ima focus more on E maths or ~~A maths~~. haizzz... mayb i shall do more on E Maths yaar? i dunno.. mayb i shud score more on E tis tyme denn A. yeahhs.

anieways, i shall go now denns.ciaoz. teehee. Nura, You're halfway there already girl! Keep it up yaar?!

wee!

2006-05-15T13:58:00.000+08:00

Socal Studies & POA paper 1 down!! weehee!! lols. SS sucks mann. i cant seem to concentrate. my mind was blank at last. lols. as in.. in a bad way larhx. denn i cant really write down the factors. so i tink i did BADLY. haizz... wat to do...

anieways... did up da proposals & stuff. rearding da cuocnillors camp larhx. denn now at CC wif Sherry & Yatee playing comm. lols. the things teenagers do ot waste their money. at home gt com still come dwn hyere to play. lols. cant help it larhx. tis called PEER PRESSURE.

anieways. thought of HIM alot to dae. haizz... why must i keep tinkin of him wen ive told myself tt i MUST concentrate & SHALL forget him?! tis is so frustrating larhx! haizz.. sometimes i worry abt him but sometimes.. haizz.. i cxan juz laff at his antics. smile at his gestures which are vry rare now. lols. anieways, in short, i miss him lots.

aiite now. i tink id better go. lols. i shall search for other stuff to do larhx. see ya. ciaoz.

"Darling i love you!

You don't know how i Love you!"

Turbulence of Emotions.

2006-05-14T16:02:00.000+08:00

Oh well. Where do i start? Sometimes I feel like no one can ever undersatnd me. Sometimes not even me. I wonder why. It's also difficult for me to express myself. It's like, i see this one thing happening & i would want to say something abt it. but when i reach home to my blog page, i don't know what to say. Like now.

Yesterday i saw a pair of close friends i reckon. They were young. And one of them spoke darn good English. It has an American accent. And well, i couldn't help but feel a twinge of envy. it's like Wow. That's very cool. And she was so elegant and poised. It makes me think again about me. If only i can be half as good as her.

Then i saw this little girl. She was well-dressed. She was eating. And the food she was eating was high class food. Trust me. And her mum was sitting cross-legged reading the magazine. It's like. Wow. another thought struck me. I wanna be like her. I want to earn well & work well to enable my children to speak so well, so eloquently and be so poised. I want them to have nice clothes to wear, to have wahtever they want to have. But at the same time, i thought again. I want them to be able to speak for themselves. To know what they really want.

Anyways, i'm just stressed out & also wired up. lols. With exams and all. I cant take it any longer. I'm studying & studying but it seems to me like nothing really went in. It sucks. And the fact that the rest are studying like crazy [mugging], now that's so oh my gawd to me. i'm not the studying material. haiz.

Anieeways, before i go, i just wanna say. I miss HIM. i really do. I think of what he's doing right now. haizz. If only... If only... nvrm. I came to a realisation today and that it. Love is unbelievable. lols. ciaoz.

Tts wat frens are for?

2006-05-10T21:53:00.000+08:00

You should pick your Supportive Sidekick

The Just Between Friends Test
Brought to you by Tickle

Love Hurts

2006-05-10T21:47:00.000+08:00

You're single because you don't want to get hurt

Why Are You Still Single?
Brought to you by Tickle

baby, i'm back!

2006-05-04T18:58:00.000+08:00

lols. okies. mayb tts a lil too late ya? but nvrm. been pretty lazy and tired to blog and all.. so yeahhs. teehee.

SO many things happened during the KUANTAN trip. but nyehh. i'm too lazy to blog it in right now. plus my relatives are coming so yeahh. haizz.. wat to do.

to top things off, the Mid Year is starting soon. lols. actually.. tomoro is aledi da MT papers. lols. ARGH!!! i still got da malay idioms to memorise or atleast understand and everything. lols.

anieways. i no longer like him tt muc. teehee. yepps. i sorted my thoughts out larhx. so yeahhs. now i no lnger like him TT muc. a lil bit? mayb once in a while but den nth more afta tt. lols. so yeahh.

anieways, am off to go and like STUDY. lols. will blog more over da weekends aiite? teehee. see y'all. =) ciaoz.

i'm a kisser

2006-04-28T19:41:00.000+08:00

You're a Romantic Kisser

What Kind of Kisser Are You?
Brought to you by Tickle

Shhh... its a secret!

2006-04-28T19:19:00.000+08:00

You keep secrets about yourLove Life

What's Your Buried Secret?
Brought to you by Tickle

Moments

2006-04-28T18:57:00.000+08:00

This song is so.. matching to what i have to say to HIM.

If I die tonight, I’d go with no regrets
If it’s in your arms I know that
I was blessed
And if your eyes are the last thing that I see
Then I know the beauty heaven holds for me

But if I make it through, if I live to see the day
If I’m with you, I’ll know just what to say
The truth be told, girl you take my breath away
Every minute, every hour, every day

‘Cause every moment we share together
Is even better than the moment before
If every day was as good as today was
Then I can’t wait until tomorrow comes

A moment in time, is all that’s given you and me
A moment in time, and it’s something you should seize
So I won’t make the mistake of letting go
Everyday you’re here I’m gonna let you know

That every moment we share together
Is even better than the moment before
If every day was as good as today was
Then I can’t wait until tomorrow comes

Each morning that I get up, I love you more than ever
So girl I’ll never go away, never stray

So every moment we share together
Is even better than the moment before
If every day was as good as today was
Then I can’t wait until tomorrow comes
(repeat)

I love, love, love the moments (oh yeah)
Moments we share together
I love, love, love the moments (oh yeah)
I pray they’d last forever
(Repeat)

i was feelin so down... =[

2006-04-28T18:39:00.000+08:00

the bell rang and it was as though all hell broke loose. student streamed out of the classes. Most of them feeling anxious, some dreadness cos they've got the Artsfiesta rehearsal to go to, the booths to set up. Those who are not involved rejoiced & went home 2 hours earlier. Making plans of all sort.

Except this one girl. She looks around her & find that all her friends are involved. She looks around and find them rushing around, standing around, listening to instructions then walking off with a set face to get the job done. She has no part in this grand event. Cos she's going off... so far away from others.

haizz.. ok tts a lil bit dramatic.. but yeahhs. i was really so so sadd on my way home alone... until i later met Ayin, Tempe & Wina. I mean.. well.. I was supposed to be the emcee but i had to back out JUZ BECUS my family & relatives are goin off to Kuantan. =( it sucks more wen well... all of them are like doing stuff together. they are IN THIS together. urgh. dey might not realise it but this one event wud somehow make them closer to each other. nvrm. i aint makin sense.

In short, i'm envious, sad, excited & missing this mega event. haizz.. but nvrm. i'll juz go off to Kuantan and be hapiie. =) yeahhs. tts da spirit gurl.

haizz... the one thing that has been on my mind since da past few daes is HIM. i miss him lots. i dunnoe why but i juz miss him. to make things worst, i'll be gone for like 3 daes. urgh.i'm sure gonna be thinkin of him 24/7. argh!!! i miss him so so so so so much!! how?!?! cant get to see him and all. haizz... i'm really so so sad lorhx... ='(

to top things off in the worst kinda way, i cant even atleast watch the friggin concert. i cant see shun shun performing. argghhh!!!! tis is so so frustratin larhx!! my gawd. life sucks to da max. urgh. nvrm.

to brighten up my dae, i ended up singing karaoke! lols. yepps. at first i was too SHY. altho got no one at home. lols. but den i finally gave in to the temptations & juz sang my heart out. When i sang the song 'Moments', i cudnt help but think of HIM. teehee. *shy* so yeahhs. tts abt all i guess. lols. ciaoz.

oh i miss him so. oh i miss him so. =(

Questionaire

2006-04-27T18:51:00.000+08:00

Name 20 people you can think of right now at the top of your head. Don't read the questions underneathe until you write the names of all 20 people. Ready...? Start!

1.Neo
2.Sharifah
3.Shun Shun
4.Aaron
5.Jeremiah
6.Brett
7.Cherish
8.Julia
9.Diana
10.Nas
11.Sharie
12.Wei Jian
13.Jasmine Kua
14.Jasmine Low
15.Kenny
16.Jezebel
17.Nicholas
18.Haudy
19.Dominic
20.Kaishun

ok, now for the questions.
1.how did you meet 14?
cheyy. tis one is in the council board. lols. den got closer wen we're in da same class larhx. lols.

2.What would you do if you've never met 1?
Awww. I'd die cos got no nipples to tehh. lols. and oso he's da joker larhx so wif no him den vry sian mahhx. =D

3.What would you do if 20 & 9 dated?
my gawd. tts like weird larhx cos i dun tink they even interact wif one another. lols. plus kaishun is not diana's kinda guy. lols. rite gurl?

4.Did you ever like 19?
Errm, actually no. lols. but i like his cool demeanor & sometimes playful side of him. And his got a hot bod. lols.

5.Would 6 & 17 make a good couple?
Errr... if tis is Brookeback Mountain den i'd sae yes. Nick is physically huge & Brett is ermm.. HUGE. lols.

6.Describe 3.
Shun Shun! lols. he's a vry nice guy actually. playful at times & aggressive sometimes too! like twisting ppl's ear! lols. but he's also disciplined being da drum major & all. then he is helpful too for helping people all da time wif Maths & stuff. lols. and not forgettin, he looks so cute wen he sleeps! wakrakakka. too bad he's got a gf larhx. lols

7.Do you think 8 is attractive?
Yes. In her julia-way. lols. vry nice personality & all. u go Juliao!

8.Tell me sth about 7.
She's TALL. tts one thing for sure. she's cute too! teehee. a vry sweet personalitied gal. =)

9.Do you know any of 12's family?
Errr, like no. lols.

10.What's 8's favourite?
She likes to laugh! lols. and touch her hair & haf lots of fun everydae. =)

11.What would you do if 18 just confessed he/she likes you?
I'll laugh my ass off. lols. tts impossible. plus its juz NOT possible. lols

12.What language does 15 speak?
Errr.. Engllish, Mandarin & Army commands?

13.Who is 9 going out with?
That's easy. Shahaireen. however u spell tt name. in short.. SHAH!

14.How old is 16 now?
She has recently turned 16! =) hapiie belated buffdae!

15.When's the last time you talked to 13?
Yesterdae larhx. =)

16.Who is 2's favourite band /singer?
all those rockers!! lols.

17.Would you ever date 4?
YESH!! lols. actually no larhx. if aaron carter den its ABSOLUTELY yes.

18.Would you ever date 7?
teehee. yepps. tall is cool too u noe. u cn see our contrast. short fat, tall thin. lols.

19.Is 15 single?
I dun tink so. lols.

20.What is 10's last name?
Err... Arriffin? lols. full name is easy. Nasiha Bte Ariffin eat Muffin. =D

21.Would you ever be in a serious relationship with 11?
like NEVER! urgh.

22.What school does 3 goes to?
School for IDIOTS & SPASTIC ppl. lols. and tts Deyi. =D

23.Where does 6 lives?
somewhere in Australia. tho i'm not really sure where.

24.What's your favourite thing about 5?
He is so so nice to bully. a very very nice guy. lols. funny too!

25.Have you seen number 1 naked?
Errr, how about half-naked? lols. i wud love to! so tt i can TWIST his balls & PULL his dick. wakrakakka. =)

tt was fun. lols.

Beautiful Confession

2006-04-27T18:43:00.000+08:00

If envy is a sin then
I am the incurable sinner
for I envy every eye that ever caught a glimpse of you.
I envy the waves that carried your voice,
and the air that touched your cheeks.
I envy even the ground that once served you,
and I confess to you that despite my indulgent sins,
my shameful whimsies and ugly flimsies,
I confess to you, "I love you."

My confessions are as silly as my muted words.
You have been loved by so many more substantial than I,
and what good does my silence or confession possibly do?
So many moments have I sat sheltered by the night in the midst of these books, my mind fulfilled but my heart calling for you.
Only my shame restrains my words from filling pages of books a
nd from whimpering into the night, "I long for you."

tis is not written by me.

Anieways, that text up there.. is straight on the bull's eye! lols. anieways, lets not tok abt tt anymore. makes me depressed.

todae Mrs Chew changed our sitting position AGAIN. haizz. wont she juz let go & live? haiz... nvrm. movin on, we are all now sitting according to our index number. urgh! how frustrating cn tt be? lols. but nvrm. i am sitting somewhere close to Shun Shun still. teehee. and i've got Aaron sitting beside me! weee! lols. and tt Debbie. lols. basically, i'm sitting where da gila guys are. how cool...

anieways, came home early to dae at around 4. found out tt Mum not at hme, dad nt yet home & me wif no key. wee... waited for daddy before i cud come up. urgh. so irritated. but nvrm. its all in da past.

so yeahhs. tomoro we're like goin off at 10.30am! lols. how cool is cool?! yeehaaww! moz prob buying Mac breakfast for tt Shun & Sharifah larhx. lols. we are hungry pigs early in da morn. weee! tink i wanna go now. am halfway through my SS notes lerhx. teehee. ciaoz.

slackerz inc.

2006-04-25T20:42:00.000+08:00

urgh. life shucks. oh well mayb da dae wen i find sth worthwhile in my life den i'll truly say tt life is BEAUTIFUL. =D

anieways, haf been slacking these past 2 weeks. aiyo. cannot make it larhx. & da Mid Yr Exams are like next week fridae start le... teehee. sure kena go in S-cube. die larhx. cannot go hme early or go pakto [howevr u spell tt]. teehee.

ystd Shun didnt come to sch but todae he did. lols. was a lil bit lonely without him ystd. cos he's alwaes da one kena bullied or bullying me. lols. i'm so so proud of Shun. so proud of my lil baby bro. wakrakakka. anieways..

came home late as usual. sis called & was grumbling. i dunno wats wrong wif her larhx. been calling me afta sch these few daes. so WADEVA. urghh. so yepps. den stayed in da councillor room wif jas, Bev, Cristal, Cheryl Tan and Neo. lols. da rest went off afta a while left wif Jas, Neo & me. haizz.. for those who noes me well.. i'm sure u noe war broke out...

so yeahhs. played wif my nephew went i got home. needed to pee badly. managed to get it out b4 i did so in da councillor room, 262 SBS bus, walking home and on my living room. lols.

anieways.. i miss him larhx. lols. wat to say.. i everytime miss him. even if he's right in front of me or he's around me somewhere, i wud still miss him. wakrakkaka. i'm an idiot larhx. spastic too. wee! kk. ciaoz.

we did IT!

2006-04-23T19:20:00.000+08:00

Gold with HONOURS people! we did it!! yeshh!!! lols. we did it we did it... *dances around* teehee. we [da stud leads] went off earlier at around 8.00am. around 8.45am we reached i tink. yeahh.. den we walked aroun da stadium & all. i played wif Neo's walkie talkie. so fun!

den yeshh.. we started lazing around. & it was friggin hot u noe! da heat was unbearable. we were sweating like pigs & we smell like one too! urghh! it was TAT bad. den wen our shift finish, we all went off like all hell broke loose. lols. half went Marina, Half went Bugis den Agnes & Neo went bak sch wif Miss Foo.

took neoprints wif Kua & Rach Lee. lols. da guys left us so we wandered around. den we walked back to da National Stadium. did i mention tt we walked to Bugis?! lols. and we three were late! wen we arrived, everyone was there. so yeahh..

i was shouting, screaming & blowing my whistle. lols. we cheered & all. and wen it started, i was SO friggin nervous. wen our band came in, we were all screaming like fuck sia. lols. oops sry abt tt. it all went EXCELLENTLY until Shun shun dropped da maze. my heart dropped along with it. oh my gawd. but he recovered vry quickly. as tho nth happened. my heart BLOOMED wif pride. lols. way to go Shun Shun!

i cudnt help it but cried a lil. well not really. tears didnt flow dwn but it gathered. i noe Shun said he'll drop it but well.. it WAS a oh-my-friggin-gawd moment u see. i was overwhelmed. but SHUN U DID GREAT! SPLENDID!

and den we went home. lols. yepps. we did. as in all of us. lols. yepps. den we all stank da bus & all. lols. it was pretty cool larhx. reached home, bathed & hit da sack. i was so tiredd.

den todaee woke up quite early & went Tekka. lols. yepps. whole family. ate at Komala's.. its a veggie restaurant. argh. den walked around. bought stuff den home we went. lols. den wrote some story ironed clothes & now tinkin of doin hw. lols. i.. MISS him. ciaoz.

p.s: i cant WAIT for my Kuantan trip. weee!

lets keep tis short yeahhs.

2006-04-21T21:19:00.000+08:00

ok. todae. morning had cheers. shouted but voice not hoarse. YET. then had bio test. dang it ima fail tis test too. shit larhx.

den da band members went off early. rehearsal. final one i guess in school before tomoro's SYF. so nervous for dem. oh yeahhs. da reason for da morning cheering & all is cos of da band larhx. gona cheer for dem tomoro.

so yeahhs. den had Guides. it was KILLING me slowly. SO boring larhx. lols. den ermms... went home. bathed. den went out again. walking home wen it started to rain. argh. ran all da way to da void deck. den went home.

den tomoro am waking up early to iron my friggin skirt. washed my recent ones. so am gonna wear tt short skirt. eew. ermm... den tomoro oso meetin jas earlier. go eat breakfast. haizz.. so tired. kks. me wan sleep lerhx.

dMb, you guys can make it derhx! Shun Shun, wo hui zhi chi ni! jia you, ppl! do us proud yeahhs? =]

[ no title ]

2006-04-19T19:13:00.000+08:00

hey y'all. =) haven been updatin haf i? lols. anieways, Shun Shun is cool wif da pics online so yeahhs. dun ask anymore qns aiite? juz enjoy it. its nt everydae u see a guy sleep like tt! lols.

anieways, juz got home from AMK central. went out wif my parents actually. teehee. we were juz walkin around aimlessly wen we saw da Banquet open aledi. so we wenta eat there. one word. y - u - M! teehee. its really vry nice. i was so so full tt i cudnt finish my drink. ooopsies.

den walked around again. den bought ermmm tis one popular shoe now. lols. forgot wat its called. den browse around den went home. lols. anieways, am intending to buy camiosole [howeva u spell tt thingy] and/or a skirt. 7 bucks oni lorhx. teehee. cheap cheap!

kks... i tink i dun really like him tt much anymore. tinkin again... why did i EXACTLY fall in love wif him for?! hmmmms. i dunno. i wudnt wanna divulge too much lest ppl cn aledi guess who. teehee. anieways, who i like now may not be who u tink i like. lols. chim arhx.

OH YEAHS. thankies to those who tagged me or rather FLOODED me. i shall not say who arhx.... yes Jas? =P i feel so loved now. =) u nvr noe wat a short hello or heyys, stay cheerful, can REALLY lift a person's spirit. =) ciaoz.

Baby you, there's no more just getting by,
You're the reason i feel so alive.

tis pics caused me to haf aches everywhere on my bod.

2006-04-17T18:49:00.000+08:00

tis is called major puffing!
lols. tis pic is taken wen shun
is sleeping! weee!
look at those cheeks
ladies!

tis is called 'drum kissin!'
lols. he sleep until kiss
the table larhx. i noe u noe
we noe he dreamin of who.
wakrakakakak!

oh wat beautiful piictures! i haf one more pic but i shall not post it.. lols. todae tt stupid shun & neo tag team & attack me. and tt Sharifah oso... BETRAYER! lols. i was like screamin alot larhx. lols. cannot make it.

anieways yes. todae quite a number of free periods. lols. if oni Mr Lee nvr come. aiyah... lols. nvrm. denn todae rot a lot larhx. todae was my playful day. teehee. cudnt stop playin. den Jeremiah 3 daes hols nvr miss me. aiyoo.. sadded.

den todae went home wif jane. lols. is like during one of those daes wen i'm suddenly so so lonely. haizz... sadded larhx. but nyehh. came home & did my Lit hw. dunno how to do da other qn so yeshh.. am sort of complete larhx. =)

anieways, i miss him loads. =( earlier tis morning, i made up my mind to NOT like him anymore. but well.. wen i saw him todae.. i felt tt crush-y feelin creepin up on me again. lols. its hopeless. i'm hopelessly devoted. listen to my new song okies? its real sadd. ciaoz.

ohhh... i cant stop tinkin of him!

2006-04-16T20:01:00.000+08:00

URGH!

i am like tinkin of him rite now. each time i tink of him, my heart juz skips lotsa beats. arghhhh!!!! help me. ooofh!

sometimes i juz feel like goin up to him & kiss him smack on his cheek. lols. one of my fren is shocked now rite gurl? lols. its juz so... URGH! so frustratin. but wat da hell. it'll blow over. its blowing over a lil now. lots. i rmb wakingn up afta dreamin of him, asking myself, why in da world do i like him. lols. its was funny.

but yeahh. urgh. it'll blow over soon. in my dream, i dreamt tt he... juz not da guy i wanted. lols. so yeahh.. and i started askin myself again even in tt dream, y i like him in da first place. lol. so yeahh. i'll bide my time. ciaoz.

I MISS HIM. for now.

oh wat a vann-derr-full dae..

2006-04-16T17:56:00.000+08:00

ouhh.. had to wake up extra early todae... had my tuition. teehee. postponed it to todae from yesterdae. had a terrible headache for da past two daes. so yeahh.. pardon me yeah?

so yeahh.. ended around 1.15pm like tt. lols. we ended up talking abt our old times. lols. haizz.. i suddenly felt nostalgic todae... lols. cant stop tinking of da past. teehee. anieways, movin on. went home to find no one at home. mum & dad went out. so i took out da ironing board & da iron & iron my way through my uniforms. lols.

tt done, i kept da iron & took out my books. did my admin stuff on da iron board itself. lols. and did maths work. lols. i am so lovin myself! lols. anieways, next Sat is da dae where i will be goin to National Stadium to support my DEAREST lil bro, Shun Shun! teehee. our deyi band is gonna compete. raarrr!!

anieways.. all done, i can now relax. surf a lil mayb. teehee. am so so carefree todae. if oni i'm like tis everydae. wow. how vann-derr-full... =) ciaoz.

time to update on my life...

2006-04-14T11:41:00.000+08:00

okies. i stopped at Tuesdae didnt i? lols. Now its Fridae. Happy Good Fridae pepople! teehee. its da hols! wakrakkaka.. and yesh.. Hapiie Bdae Ayin! & hapiie belated bdae Diddy! =)

anieways.. nth much happened ever since da dae i stopped bloggin. lols. lets see ermm.. wednesdae i didnt go anywhere i tink. lols. but wadeva. Yesterdae i went back to City Hall.. go Peninsula.. lols. I dunno y i wanna go dere. i juz do. lols. went to search for my dad's pressie. in da end, i bought him jeans at good prize! teehee. =)

den we [jas, agnes, bev, me] , wenta eat at LJS... i oni noe now tt Bev is really clumsy. lols. but cute. teehee. i used to find her arrogant but she's not.. its juz her face.. lols. and yeahhs afta tt we went home. lols.

i've been rotting pretty much da whole dae todae. so yeahh.. dint wake up till like wat? close to 10.30am. lols. i dreamt of da guy i liked last year. ermmm.. i wonder wat was tt all about.

anieways, i miss him. hehe. i juz wont stop missin him i guess. =) tts my wek spot larhx. haizz.. anieways.. i tink i shall go now. i seriously am clueless on wat to do now. lols. i'm juz bored. urgh.

haizz... wat a dae.

2006-04-11T20:31:00.000+08:00

i am oh so boredd rite. now. lols. actually i'm like a grinning cat. cos i've done my LIT powerpoint presentation thingy! lols. i am SO hapiie. lols. wateva Nura.

den ermm... todae assembly was abt prize giving thingy.. u noe sth? tis is like da first time tt i see my whole class so enthu abt Bio lesson. lols. da band members didnt wanna go larhx. lols. noe why? cos we're now learning on Sexual Reproduction in humans. lols.

i asked around on how many kids my classmates want and most answered TWO. hmmm... tt used to be my ideal number of kids too. den i heard abt da pain. i saw da ugly side of it. i NOE da pain & trouble of it all. DEN, i didnt wan ANY. ~~ZILCH~~. but den i thought again. i want FOUR. lols. lemme tell u why..

i want my husband & I to work hard for each other, for our family. I want us to have four hapiie children. bright and bubbly. =) i can imagine.. them in da family car, watching cartoon... wif my husband juz looking at dem from da rearview mirror thinking abt juz how lucky he was to haf dem all... while i'm away doin da grocery. den wen i come rushing towards da car, my hubby will quickl get out of da car to help me. den he'd think.. i'm fortunate to haf her. =)

i wan each dae to begin wif a kiss and each dae to end wif one too. =) i wan a hug atleast one per dae. i wan words of affections. like, "Love, you honey." "Love you, mummy, daddy." . =) teehee. i'm tinkin too far ahead. lols. but yeahhs. tts wat i dream of to achieve in future.

anieways. i miss him. lots todae. teehee. anieways yeahh.. ju\ cant stop tinkin of him larhx. haizz.. i wonder if he noes.. teehee. i'd die of embarrassment if he does.. haizz.. FORGET IT NURA. ciaoz.

some pics.

2006-04-10T21:02:00.000+08:00

oh my Fullerton Hotel.

i am so in love wif tis hotel.

i MUST go there once in my life.

look at them go!

lols. so cute!

like me. =D

oh i miss them all.

i want the old times back!

not many pics larhx. teehee. all expired lerhx larhx. anieways. afta much bellydancing-ing, i declare my hips officially dislocated. teehee. cannot tahan larhx. anieways, i'm off now. go find other stuff to post. teehee.

omg... body aching!

2006-04-10T19:04:00.000+08:00

aiyo... body all pain... didnt noe my bag is like SO heavy larhx. teehee. afta sch, wet to Funan wif Neo to get the councillors' stuff. teehee. didnt notice tt place until todae larhx. aiyo... so nua. wadeva tt means. teehee.

den walk walk walk around... juz looking for da files. teehee. so yeahh.. Neo so indecisive.. lols. kiddin larhx. wenta eat at KFC. wahh... tt outlet is like 3 in 1 larhx. KFC,Pizza Hut & Taco Bell. wow! lols. but i didnt noe larhx. i bought shrooms meal.. as alwaes. lols.

denn afta one last round, we went home. eh no, wenta buy Angelina bdae gift. teehee. Hapiie Bdae!! teehee. den FINALLY we went home. and my back is aching. aiyo... oh yeahhs, met Juliao. lols. interesting how in one month cn haf so many ppl's bdae. haiyoo...

so now.. am bloggin.. den mayb later i go off and do some Maths? haizz.. i seriously worry abt my studies larhx. like.. cannot make it lorhx. haizz.. sian larhx. muz jia you like siao lerhx. haizz... 2 more weeks to Kuantan... weee. . .
wats gonna happen to my revisions? haizz....

p.s: i miss him larhx. siao rite? everytime miss him but he dunno. haiyo. lan fei si jian. haiyo... ciaoz.

pick da pics.

2006-04-09T19:20:00.000+08:00

here are some of da pics i took. =)

shun shun's new hairdo. lols

tis what we do in class. teehee.

sweet? sad thing is we've divorced.

rmb i said i bought bras? teehee.

my spastic frens dere. lols.

i'm so ORGANISED.

2006-04-09T12:01:00.000+08:00

yeshh. i am. no wonder i'm a function ORGANISER. teehee. anieways.. todae told my mum to wake me up at around 9 or 9.30... wanna noe why? come closer... cos i'm cleaning the house!! teehee.

so yeahh... bathed. had my breakfast den switched on the com to play loud music and OFF i go to clean the house! Maid Nura is in da hse!! teehee. i vacuumed all those dusts that haf been mocking at me... GRRRR.. now I haf da last laff.. wahahahha... den mopped the floor... now it smells so Christmassy... i forgot wats da smell called. lols. Pine? errr nvrm. teehee.

den i ORGANISED my poa file... lols. i NOE. ur eyes are growing larger. lols. but u noe... it took my juz a while cos... lots of worksheets are missing! lols. oopss.. Mrs Luah is gna kill me.... =S

and now.... i am juz.... slacking. oh yeahh, did i mention tt i actually ticked away all the tasks i've done?! lols. WOW. i LOVE da new & improvED me. =D

serious business now, awwww... sad to sae, i miss him more... i dunno why but i juz do. lols. for those who noes me... i noe u tink i'm obsessed but ohhh... wait till u're havin a deep crush.... it'll be crushing on you!! teehee. but yeahh.. my heart juz somersaults wenever i tink of him, see him or sth... haizz... i'll go off ironing my clothes now. my last task. and mayb daydream of him.. lols. i tink ima burn my unifomr. oops. ciaoz.

"Oh i can't stop thinking about you. Your face sets a smile on mine. You evoke such hapiie thoughts in me."

i've got my MOUSE back!!

2006-04-08T21:42:00.000+08:00

teehee. i juz cant contain my joy!! i need to hop around!! *hop hop hop hop hop hop hop hop hop* okies okies. theres a lil earthquake here. ermmm.. nvrm. i'm so so hapiie. teehee. and guess wat color it is... GREEN. lols. those lime green!! teehee. i'm SO excited.

lols. anieways, haven been blogging much haf i? lols. been either lazy or REALLY busy. so yeahhs. weee! i dun believe it... but i am like so hyper active!! teehee. muz be da work of da mouse larhx. lols.

so yeahhs.. todae went for tuition again. lols. it lasted longer den 2 hours actually. so yeahh.. my head & eyes were like glazed... lols. den Jas, jia jun, laogong & PIG, came along. den we went off to walk around and stuff. lols. we ate Jack's Place cakes... YUMMY! simply delicious!!

teehee. anieways.. i'm off to bathe now. lols. so tiredd. and my parents are like watching some Indian true ghost stories. argh!! i'd better go now. lols. before i decide not to bathe at all!! lols. arghh!!!!!!

ps: i'm so hapiie tt i've got a mouse bak! ciaoz.

No mouse!! how to surf webbies?!

2006-04-06T16:25:00.000+08:00

Okies.. tts a really stupid title but yeahh.. i've got no mouse... so it takes me like 3 times longer to get things done on the com. urgh. its cos da spring in the batt compartment broke so yeahh... da VOLTS juz cant move. lols.

anieways.. havent been updating haf i? haizz.. wat to do... so sadd larhx... been sort of busy & all... lets juz sum it all up aiite?

told Mrs Ang tt i cant do the emceeing for the Arts Fiesta thingy.. haizz... u noe why? cos i'm goin Kuantan! haizz.. i dunno to laff or to cry.. lols. but yeahh.. den ermmm... den on tt dae tt i told Mrs Ang tt i cannot go is we had a meeting. PSCs... & da CEC council. WOTeva. it was pretty intersting larhx. not da first part tho. da first part was BULLSHIT. so yeahh.. teehee. oops. pardon me lang.

denn yepps.. haizz.. i still cant believe tt tis yr i'm takin my Os... BELIVE IT NURA!!!! teehee. i mean is like SO fast larhx. den all da stuff is like i dunno lorhx. die lerhx. da most jia lat is my BIO. haizz.. surprise tt i didnt sae maths? teehee. its bio lorhx. haizz...

i find tt... mayb its better to forget him bahx. i mean.. urghh. but i cant u noe. cos its not alwaes tt i haf a crush which i am.... one way or another close with. at least we're talking yeah? unlike my other crushes.. i dun even talk to them. they dun even noe tt i exist! atleast he noes.. i guess... so yeahh... but wat da heck. i dunno larhx. mayb its not da time yet. haizz...

Footprints

2006-04-02T20:12:00.000+08:00

tis is a story tt was told to me by a fren.

A man was walking on the beach with God when his whole life flashed past him. he realised that there was always two sets of footprintsduring the cause of his life. One his, the other God's. But what disturbed him most was that in the worst part of his life, when he was down having to do things beyond his capability, he saw only one set of footprints. So he asked God. "Why did you disppear when I needed you most?" And God replied. "During all your trials and tribulation my child, i did not leave you...". "I carried you," he continued.

God helped him & stayed with him through all the tough times. He was there. He IS there. He is ALWAYS there.

It was really a nice story. I dunno if it was to boost my morality or not. But thinking again... i realise that i am so afraid of disappointing the people around me. Even God.

I'm afraid of disappointing Miss foo right now by not giving a good proposal. I know i shouldn't make excuses abt tis & tat.. but u see, i simply don't know how to do. And with that, i disappointed myself.

I'm so afraid of flunking my studies. i So wanna study abroad and all... but i cant seem to find tt discipline to actually DO sth abt it. My family has sacrificed a lot for me. They sacrificed almost everything for me... and i don't want to disappoint them. i MUSN'T.

Sometimes i just feel like giving up. Raise my hands up high, shout "I surrender!", and just crawl into my private whole & curl up to sleep. often now, i feel so tired. i feel so lethargic. i feel so.... dead. i cant seem to find the old me no more. i want the old me back.

Dear God, we had a talk the other day didn't we? I want you to know that whatever i said, i ment it. The tears that i shed were pure. PLease God, guide me. Show me YOUR light.

life is gettin to be vry boring....

2006-04-01T15:42:00.000+08:00

yeahh... its getting to be very monotonous.. life tt is. i dunno if its juz me... but i dun feel so vibrant anymore. i'm juz oh so so tired these daes.

anieways, Mrs Chew changed our sitting positions... Shun Wai & Sharifah are now sitting tgether while i was left to sit wif Benedict & Jeremiah. i mean.. wat da hell?! i dun mind if u make me sit wif ppl who cn help me... but Ben... Jeremiah?! oh my gawd. tts like so ruining my life. and she was laughing abt it. i was so pissed & sad. afta recess, i was sulking... But Shun Wai came bak. lols. but sharifah had to go off so it was left wif da two of us. teehee. hapiie family!

den didnt go for Guides. went for da emceeing thingy.. haizz.. it was pretty ok i guess da performances... but oh well... we're gonna come up wif da script ourselves.. or rather I am gonna come up wif da script myself. lols. i dunno whether to laff or cry. plus i've got my hw to so & dat sickening proposals. seriously.. i tink we shud juz wrap up tis dinner thingy & throw dem away.

but anieways.. todae... went off for tuition at AMK library. lols. sat near tis Tomato Room. its actually a room used for tuition purposes by authorized ppl. lols. but it got pretty irritating wen da ppl keep walking pass us.. den todae covered da chapters tt i was lagging bhind ... now its pretty handle-ble. lols. wafeva. and den supposed to meet Jas but my batt was low & all so we cudnt contact. plus she was late. den i called her but no one picked up. so i assumed she was in da middle of sth.. so i left.. called her again but no one answered.

it wasnt wen i reached home tt she called me. she said she now at da library. oh frush! i'm so sorry Jas!! now u see wat hps fo to us? we are SO dependent on hps. haizz.. so yes.. did i mention da fact tt i've yet to eat a proper breakfast & lunch?! tis morning i went around to eat breakfast but none was ready. i dun like MacD tho. so yeahh... ate bread. aww... so anieways.. i'm off now to slack mayb. i juz got no mood.... mayb i'm off to watch my SHAKESPEARE IN LOVE! ciaoz.

wat a beeeeauuutiful dae!

2006-03-29T16:11:00.000+08:00

lols. i'm lying. anieways. todae a lot a lot a lot of FREE PERIODS!! lols. weee!! so hapiie. spent my time dunno doing wat oso. lols. i am like oh SO forgetful.

anieways.. i am da emcee for da NIGHT concert. lols. so hapiie! me & Mirliana are involved as da emcees for da night concert for Art Fiesta. lols. i am like SO excited lerhx!! yay!! lols

met Mrs Ang juz now abt da emcee thingy. den afore tt was discussing wif Neo abt da council board thingy. haizz.. he is like so enthu abt it... hopefully he wont neglect his studies anymore. jia you!

then it was raining! lols. i LURVE rain! den Neo was already nagging & nagging. den Shi Li joined us. lols. so da three of us went home together larhx... =) shared umbrella wif Shili tho i was already wet. diao. lols

and now i am home. soon going off to bathe.. do my homework den mayb juz chill a lil bit. lols. i am such a good GIRL. =) ciaoz.

i'm on the top of the world...

2006-03-27T21:16:00.000+08:00

i dunno why but todae i'm like super hyper. lols. some might say its an every day kinda thing for me but todae i was REALLY hyper. lols.

i woke up todae wif tis msg in mind, i cn still rmb... "yippee! itz mondae. muz wake up wif a positive attitude todae. yay!" then i went back to sleep. lols. wen i woke up, i was late. lols.

den todae, i listenend to all da lessons in class. there wasnt any Physics &... wat was da other period. oh yeahh... Social Studies. i was like so friggin happiie. lols. had a really INTERESTING talk wif Sarah & Winnie. lols. it was friggin funny. i still cant believe those gurls are like tt. which is cool! unlike other gurls... yea gurls, rock on!

den todae came home early oso.. lols. 2++ i at hme lerhx... teehee. so guai rite? i NOE... den did all my English homework larhx. my compo & letter writing. lols. i bought lotsa new things todae. i bought new foolscap, new pen and.... new BRASSIERE!!

oops, forgot to add an S to dat. lols. i bought TWO. lols. one pink & yellow. i shall take pics of it den show u larhx. NO! not wif it on ME. aiyo.. juz like tt oni... lols. i feel so LOVED todae. awww...

anieways.. i finished all my homeworks, except for English Newsweek... ermmm... i've got no new book to read... and so i'm bloggin. maybe later i go write story? lols. its been a long time sia... so yeshh.. i shall go away for now.. teehee. ciaoz!

Pink Chiffon!

2006-03-26T20:00:00.000+08:00

Your signature color is Pink Chiffon

There's nothing saccharine about you — your sweetness is one hundred percent natural! A gentle, thoughtful romantic like you must be paired with a color that's soft and warm — but still has a subtle sophisticated sheen. That's why Pink Chiffon is the perfect color for you! You're probably known for making the most of every situation and trying to see the best in people. But while you may be cheerful and innocent at times, you're nobody's fool. You may see the world through rose-colored glasses, but you can still see, after all.

While you make wise insights time after time, it's probably your good nature and perpetual optimism that are what you're known for and what make you a joy to be around. Even those who sometimes make fun of your Pollyanna-like proclamations will turn to you when they need a friend and some cheering up. So keep pink, Chiffon. With you around, the world's a better place!

What's Your Signature Color?
Brought to you by Tickle

Well well well... would you just READ that?! lols. anyqys.. haven been updating haf i? anieways... been pretty busy these past few days..

had the parent teacher meeting.. had quite a lot of negative remarks. arghh!!! but Mrs Chew was vry nice abt me. lols. awww... even Mrs Luah is being understanding. i'm like so so touched but yeahh.. Mr Lee was da cruelest one!! i was killed by him. oh my sorrowful heart!

anieways.. had tuition and all.. so yeahh.. nth much to update on. btw.. did i mention tt BRYAN's BACK! lols. yepps. tt cute guy is back. weee!! i've gt my fren back..

anieways.. i miss him lots! lol. i mean.. i dunno... my feelings for him cn sometimes be so intense..haizz.. but i tink.. its juz not da time yet... yeahh... like many of wat happened btwn me & my crushes.. they never knew. lols. so yeahh.. =) ciaoz.

life shucks...

2006-03-23T21:20:00.000+08:00

urgh.. i took a day off from doing homework. my eyes are juz so so sleepy!! todae had a meeting abt da dinner thingy.. its in June. da 2nd. argh!!! lols. crazy me.

anieways... nth extraordinary happened todae... teehee. except mayb da dinner part but i shall not divulge anything tonite. mayb tomoro... lols. yepps.. anieways...

I CANT STOP THINKING OF HIM!!!! arghhh!!! tt sucks to da core larhx. i mean.. wat da hell.. here i am trying to forget him but its like so so so hard. haizzz... anieways... my entries from now onwards are like gonna be short. cos my mind is wandering and i am really really tired. haizz.. and i still cant believe MT Written Paper for O lvl is in less den 2 months time! argh!! ciaoz.

Firefly come back to me...

2006-03-21T20:05:00.000+08:00

changed my song according to my mood... haizz... life has been pretty ko i guess. teehee. lols. but well.. atleast i'm finally taking up the path to better student. i am actually doing some of my homeworks. nopes. its actually MOST of my homeworks.

anyways.. one thing's for sure.. i miss him loads. i juz cant stop thinking of him larhx. haizz.. its so hard larhx... is like.. rarely see him now larhx.. aiyox.. so sadded larhx...

but nevermind. i shall juz strive to work hard AND play hard! yesh! anieways.. sry for da short post. no feeling larhx.. lols. aiite. ciaoz.

Firefly come back to me
Make the night as bright as day
I'll be looking out for you
Tell me that you're lonely too.

P A I N

2006-03-19T17:37:00.000+08:00

arghhhhhhhhh!!!!!!!!!!! my body ache all over!! OMG. it aches like siao larhx! and all bcos of wat? bcos of kayaking! urgh. i oso had a cut on my ankle. ouchie. =( tis was wat happened.

18th March 2006
Dionne smsed me late late at nite wen i was aledi asleep, that she cudnt go. so wen i read it early at like 5.35am.. i was like... ''wat da fcuk...'' . Hui Ting backed out. Joce said she's sick. and now dionne. arghh! i felt so.. wadeva. tts like da most ugliest way of waking me up! i thought of not going at all... budden i thought again. wat da hell.. juz cos dey not going den i oso dun go? hmmm..

in da end... i WENT. there weer oni a few ppl larhx.. like less den 20 actually. lols. so yeahh.. i'd expected a lot of ppl... so yeahh.. i was da loner there.. everyone came in 3s or 2s... i was like.. LONELY....

on da bus throughtout the whole journey to the place ermm... Lim Chu kang dere.. forgot da name of da place... i talked on the phone with Hui Ting. lols. she was dere to cheer me up! yeah! thx sista! so yepps. denn went dere... blah blah blah.. partnered wif tis gal called Grace from Ping Yi Sec...

she was like irritating larhx. ''eh, turn left turn left.. i wan go to my frens..." it was like so friggin irritating larhx. so wat da heck... den blah blah blah.. we found out sth terrible. our kayak got crack!! PANIC ATTACK!!!! cos our kayak got water larhx.. at first i thought it was normal.. but i thought wrong. uh oh...

so we had to kayak back to shore.. being the amateurs tt we are.. we cudnt kayak bak!! DOUBLE PANIC ATTACK!!!! and da next thing u noe... i was surfacing from da sea. we CAPSIZED!!! lols. my GAWD. and our instructor told us to swim bak to shore wif da kayak.. we tried but wat da hell.. da current was pulling us larhx. thk GOD we were wearing lifejacket.. else i'd DIED.

to keep da story short.. a male saved us. he's.... tall dark & handsome... NOT! he's a cute apek larhx... lols. cute rite? he took us into his boat. so yeahh.. wadeva it was.. more things happened. cut myankle against tis moldy rock... urgh. and yeahh...atlast we ewre back on shore. waited for like 20 minutes? or less? for other kayakers to come bak. den Grace & me decided to skip it. NO MORE kayaking.

den made new frens.. wif Suba & Ming Xi. teehee. they are a cool pair! seriously. totally. so yeahh.. we clicked so fast. den from den on.. things started falling into place. lol. i got to know 2 girls from Chong Cheng Sec... Cheryl and.. i dunno da other name... and Grace turned out to be pretty nice too. lols. so yeahh...

19th March 2006
so todae i woke up wif aching body and all. it really hurts la.. my arms cannot tahan larhx.. aiyo... b4 tt.. da nite b4.. i had really strange, scary dream/s. its like all jumbled up larhx.. until i was totally breathless. da funny part was tt i kep FARTING! lols. and oso wen i burped rite... its so... gas-sy. urgh. so yeahh.. den went to breakfast.. den home.. den did bio notes.. chatting. and yeahh.. seriously. life is slacking rite now. urgh. help me pls.

what a boring dae!

2006-03-17T17:52:00.000+08:00

cn u believe it? i've been rotting da whole dae todae! argh!! cannot tahan lerhx larhx! so tut lorhx. do nth at hme.. tho gt hw.. but like no feeling to do nehh...

todae i woke up like around 10++ ?! lols. late rite? cos atlast todae need not wake up so early to go sch. toade no sch!! yay!! den watched tv... around 12++ den i go bathe... weeee! smelly smelly horx? lols.

todae i WAS trying to do my hw.. but den da feeling is juz not there... teehee... gets a lil worrying now but wat da heck...

tomoro got my kayaking course. weee! cant wait sia.. teehee... am going wif Joyce & Dionne. teehee. both my juniors lorhx.. but nvrm.. since hui ting pangsehh me.. i shall still enjoy myself! yay!!

anieways, i miss him lots. i noe i told Jas tt i no longer like him. but well, its nt really tt easy to JUZ forget someone. i really dun like him anymore but tt doesnt stop me from juz tinking of him. lols. i'm not sure if tt makes sense. wat da hell. ciaoz.

weeee!

2006-03-16T18:33:00.000+08:00

guess wat peeps? today 407 made bread, yogurt & rice wine! weeeee! lols. it was fun really u noe...

todae had SS early in the morn. then afta tt wenta brunch wif debbie, jas, jane & sharifah. lols. we laff & tok abt lotsa things... then yeahh.. afta we ate ate ate.. we proceeded to da Home Econs room.. time for some cooking!!

its been like wat? 2 years since we all last cooked in that room? lols. it was cool u noe. Mr tan pre-prepared all the stuff so tt tomoro we need not come bak lah... we made our own bread & all... mine was in a shape of a tortoise.. Jane helped me make! lols. it was real cool.

then yeahh... went home wif da 3 pigs & Pris... den the pigs went off to buy the stuff for Flag Dae & Pris & I went home together. lols. den i was feeling a lil bit restless cum lethargic. i dunno wats wif da combination but yeahh... and now i'm here blogging. teehee. i've gotta go find my frameless specs la... cos my eyes now cannot wear tis spec le.. haizz.. stupid lah....

oh ya.. i made a layout of wat i wan my room to be like in da future. i'm starting to save up now. weee! but tis nt easy lor.. prolly in like 3 months time? haizz.. tts hard man... but nvrm. tis shall be my first serious personal project eva. yeah! ciaoz.

weeee!! no more camp!

2006-03-15T18:01:00.000+08:00

teehee. cn u belive it? camps' over!! woohoooo!! its like.. da MOST relaxing camp eva... and oso da most boring larhx... cos.. we nvr do much actually... its basically juz tent pitching.. axemanship and outdoor cooking oni mahh... denn make us stay until like 3 daes 2 nites lorhx.. haizz..

anieways... my patrol won the award. yay!!! its sth like the house thingy... but tis time oni Guides involved larhx.. DUH.

anieways... life has been pretty stressful larhx.. wat wif my sis breathing fire dwn my neck. urgh! and now the chers have changed the dinner date again. and moz prob it wont even be a ~~DINNER~~. it'd be like erm... BBQ??!! tts like so tut rite?! Neo aledi resign. gave up lerhx. den Joon Wei now askin me How... ermmm.... refund?! weeee!!!! ima sadist. =)

anieways, todae POA, i learnt sth. i RE-learnt Trading & Profit &Loss account. wakrakakakka. so fun rite?! teehee... anieways.. den wenta J8 wif Joyce & company.. lols. it was so stupid lorhx. sit dwn dere for like an hour & a half juz eating & talking. weeee! so i guess tt'll be prolly all for tadae bah... sry nvr blog often. too busy larhx. doin ~~nth~~. diao. ciaoz!

a BBq to remember... teehee.

2006-03-12T15:29:00.000+08:00

afta all those upheavals of fights wif my family, they finally relented to let me go for the bbq. BUT, jas didnt go. urgh. pangsehh lorhx!!

so met up wif da three pigs. got extremely wet b4 we even got there. cos it was raining so damn heavily! wakrakakka.. i oni brought along one t-shirt.. on which i didnt intend to change to cos i didnt intend to get wet. met up at the YCK mrt. for once, all came on time. lols.

wen we came in to the condo, Neo, Dominic, Alson & Nick if ia int wrong were there. lols. i thought nth of Neo warning me to keep my hp in my bag. lols. bad choice. anieways.. went up to Haudy's condo.. nvr been in a condo b4 so wat da heck.. its really REALLY nice...

turned out that a few other ppl were there aledi.. & yeahh... Shane was there too. lols. shane.. our deal hasnt been fulfilled... so yeahh... denn we got bad news.... uh oh...

da bbq pitt cudnt be used!!! arghh!! da guys were bu shuang lerhx... Nick was in a foul mood lorhx.. so yeahh... $300 worth of food cant be bbq-ued lorhx.. BUT. the guys had really wonderful ideas... they decided to COOK!!

how sweet is tt?! so da small; kitchen was SO occupied lorhx. lols. blah blah blah... we had da food cooked. and guess wat? i actually pulled out heads of prawns!!! urghhh!!! ask Vani & Guan Yi... lols. i was so so squemish. blargh!

so yeahh.. they decided to go swimming then.. i was tempted too. the pool was glorious at nite... so yeahh.. tempting... but Haudy said those w/o swimming costume cannot enter so yeahh... i contented myself wif juz dipping my feet. but den it seemed like some fully clothed were in..

Neo got out of da pool & wet me. soon enuff, Shun joined in & they two pushed me dwn. arghhh!!!! Shun, hw cn u do this to me?!! but Shun, ur body not bad la horx? lols. my lil baby bro. weeee! i go complain to mummy lerr... but horx, Sharifh put up a huge fight wen we tried to get her in. lols. she was rolling on the pavement for ppl's sake! lols. but in da end. she got DUNKED!!

so yeahh.. tts basically wat happened. teehee. to Jas, u missed out on the fun gal! and yeahh... mum didnt really nag. went home wif Dominic & Neo. took same bus. den it was home sweet home time.. teeeheee... it was really nice u noe... last year of school & yeahh.. tis is how we shud party. the most memorable BBQ indeed. ima miss them all. awww shucks... ciaoz.

P.S: i sipped a lil bit of alcohol! weee! beer. from thailand. diao. thx Shane!

life totally suck.

2006-03-11T16:26:00.000+08:00

oh fuck it. tis fucking post got deleted. wat da fuck. goddamit. even my fucking computer is going against me. wat the fuck sial...

i hate my fucking life rite now. its juz so fucked up. i juz hate my life & my family rite now. i juz hate dem all. i dun receive that family support from them. wat did my mum do wen i showed her da book i published? put it aside & tended to other stuff. wen she suddenly wanted to brag abt sth abtr her children.. DEN she remembers abt it.

what does my family do wen i fail my tests, wen my teachers complain abt me? they scold me & threaten me. BUT my frens encouraged me to study harder... they talked to me abt wat i did to deserve da scoldings.... THEY supported me.

i dun see the joy & grandness of being scolded & embarrassed in front of my peers. my sis resorted to tt wen i was in primary school. for gods sake! how old am i?! i'm fucking 15! wats her fucking prob?

so wat if i've been flunking my tests?! i NEED support. i CRAVE for support. do dey noe tt i've been contemplating on wat paths to take for my future career so tt i cn support THEM?! do they noe tt da money they gave me, i keep thinking thrice of how to spend it & why i shud spend it?! NO!

they dunno anything abt me. they misunderstaood my intention. they misjudged my intention. they doubted my words & intention. they dun seem to noe me at all. THEY. THEM who were supposed to know me inside out. They who shud show me moral support. teach me moral courage. show me family love. i juz dun understand dem.

haizz...

2006-03-09T20:09:00.000+08:00

i so stressed la! got tt cheerleading thingy.. SIAN. and Fan! arghhh!! i feel so tut lorhx...

todae.. i cudnt help but be a lil depressed. sth happened earlier tis morning wen i was abt to get out of da hse... dad & mum were fighting... bcos of me & stuff... more of my thang kinda thingy.. huh? nvrm. wadeva. so yeahh.. depressed me a lil. cudnt help but cry while walking to school & in da council room. thk gdness no one saw. yeah.

so todae stayed for cheerleading practised. played wif Mao Hui. lols. *plays tt sexy song* Mao Hui keeps trying to tickle me. lols. BUT. i tickled him back. he's VRY ticklsh dwn dere.... where? his legs larhx... lols.

and yeahh... stayed till like 5++ den i felt SO lethargic.... i cudnt take it anymore larhx... so yeahh... went home instead of accompanying my mates to buy the stuff.. i'm really sry yaar? i was really lethargic & darn pissed i dunno why.. so i didnt want to be a bitch & fcuk u guys up aiite? sry yeah?

so tis Saturday am off to Haudy's hse. mayb staying over? dunno larhx. prolly not. mom wont allow it. haizz... i dunno why but sometimes i find tt... my parents pay attention to me at da wrong time. haizz.. and my sis. my gawd. she's still using the tactic she did wen i was in primary school.. "i'll come dwn ur school & meet all ur frens..." she nvr quits embarrasing me in front of my peers. WHY?!

and its not helping much wif me missing him. i cudnt help it but wen i thought of someone cheating on him... i felt.. urgh. tt gal is a bitch. lols. anieways.. haven been receiving morning greetings from him.. another him larhx. he's coming back on da.. 22 if i aint wrong?! haizz.. nvrm. i tink i need to go off now. one things for sure.. I MISS HIM.